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WF News 11/06/22013
11-06-2013, 08:13 PM
Post: #1
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29th Edition


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Frosty Sentiments
Last month, an incendiary fight erupted between WNF management and the journalists union, stemming from the inability of the accounting department to fund employees raises, in wake of allegations involving the leader delegating a good portion of the paper's budget to sustain his weekly alcoholic therapy, at various taverns. After the walkout, Protestant Priest diligently hired those laborious bears from Disney World, among which Yogi was. Unfortunately, corrupt decision makings did not foresee winter hibernation, hence, the missing editions. Fortuitously, some journalists reprised their original duties, agreeing to work on furlough, in the meantime. At the time of publication, Svarog is still protesting outside of premises.

Bewitching Feedback
This thread provides the perfect platform for any sane or crazy idea, you would like to ring in Crow's ears. Some sections, in upcoming days, will be merged, while new ones spring forth. Last chance to post your ideological suggestions before shuffle day.


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Please welcome the latest members to join the forum, SomaCruz and Rjh.


Our members have made a total of 134,878 posts in 10,844 threads.
We currently have 3,000 members registered.


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Dantresh, the librarian, was awarded a silver medal for all his upstanding contributions to digital piracy. Protestant Priest's upcoming grimoire is delayed, indefinitely.


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During an inebriated afternoon daze, the news entrusted Stoner to conduct his own style of interview. And it was in that very same inebriated mood, he too conducted the interview. Slow news week, indeed.

Stoner: So shall the interview start?

Protestant Priest: sure

Stoner: Well I'll give you that you're brave with that reply......So how's wizardforums changed you?

Protestant Priest: Man, I can say, not much, really. I came in at the beginning of the year, for the occult session, once TGK sent me an invite. I didn't really expect it to be great, given the average age is pretty much in mid teenage and...

Stoner: I just asked that to make you write something and waste your time......no one really cares about the normal questions this is why Stoner is doing the interview!

Protestant Priest: ah shit

Stoner: How does that make you feel?

Protestant Priest: angry and shit. i'm gonna have to call my psych doc to ask him how I should really feel

Stoner: You will need to after this interview. Most interesting thing you did over halloween?

Stoner: You take so long to reply; these answers need to be faster than charlie sheen double dips

Protestant Priest: oh man. I went to a fucking rave, x pill, weed bond, neon lights, and shit. Passed out at 4 in the morning at a chick's house. I don't even know how I remember all that shit

Stoner: You didn't even mention dressing up? Bore whore much

Stoner: You didn't do it right that's how you remember it

Protestant Priest: I went as Baron Samedi. I don't remember screwing her. I think she did the screwing. [Image: skype-emoticon0104-surprised.gif] my ass doesnt hurt, so not that kind.

Stoner: Well we established nothing happened then. So Shadow or Hawkins who'd be better to go to the dodgy bar with giving a speech ending up going in a boat with hitler and stalin with for a rave sniffing oak wood tree with?

Protestant Priest: hot damn. Definitely Shadow. He be going on and off about church and satanism and shit. I don't think I can even fall asleep next to Shadow. I'm afraid I'd wake up with a baton sticking out my rear end, getting teabagged the crap out, but sniffing oak wood would make it alright.

Stoner: If you were going out with Shadow and you fell asleep you wouldn't be out with Shadow

Protestant Priest: true

Stoner: So the Wraith how much do you hate the group?

Protestant Priest: I don't. To be honest, I don't understand the group. I just don't get it.
Stoner: You don't get allot......Hawkins opinion, is he a cunt or genius and absolute legend?
Protestant Priest: Hmm, genius

Stoner: These answers should be wham bam thankyou mam

Stoner: Better, you're alright, I guess.

[b]Protestant Priest
: yeah I don't want the wraith coming after me.

Stoner: I wouldn't. I heard Shadow had an STI in the last orgy

Protestant Priest: That cunt. the place was probably full of 40 dollar wenches. he should have gotten Obamacare.

Stoner: Never say that about Shadow.....this interview is terminated it's been fucking awful talking all I can say is UTW!!!!!

Stoner: Post it

Protestant Priest: what kind fuckin interview is this? this is entrapment. I demand justice

Stoner: You disrespected a Wraith member. One does not simply disrespect a wraith member. Ever.

Stoner: [Image: emoticon-00106-crying.gif]

Stoner: and my cold black heart

Protestant Priest: I meant to say 400 dollar wenches

Protestant Priest: the zero slipped out

Protestant Priest: Happy

Stoner: Shadow doesn't have to pay. He's a pimp. Hookers and meth in magaluf 2k13

Protestant Priest: Riiiiiight. no one said he paid.

Stoner: I need another beer

Protestant Priest: that's how much the bitches are worth

Stoner: Bitches or sluts. Pick carefully. brb... beers been in freezer too long ffs... Back

Protestant Priest: go on

Stoner: Go on beer and gear? You alcoholic druggie :/

Protestant Priest: [Image: skype-emoticon0132-envy.gif]

Stoner: Can't tell if being sick or the hulk

Protestant Priest: that's the envy emoticon, dude. I don't have any cold brew around here. Ran out.

Stoner: Pro tip. Buy 30 and a bottle of vodka a week, sees you through before heading to the clubs. Pre drinks.

Protestant Priest: Around here, we call it, pre-gaming, but yeah, it works.

Stoner: How much would you "pregame"?

Protestant Priest: I do 2 beers and a pint of Jameson whiskey, zig zag to the subway, then to the club. I mostly don't remember my nights

Stoner: You must get roofied

Protestant Priest: I'm also sure several youtube videos of me floats around

Stoner: We do half pints of vodka redbull for half a litre each then few wkd, then taxisssssssss

Protestant Priest: do you guys still know how much to pay the cabbie, people usually overpay them, once drunk

Stoner: Norm its about 3, I'd hand 5. if we're at someone elses house its about 6/7, I'd just give 10. Not bothered. Or we have a driver

Protestant Priest: Our designated driver often turns into designated drinker, so we still end up taking the subway. it's a lose lose game

Stoner: Our driver drunk anyway. We aren't bothered still gets us there

Protestant Priest: Surprised

Stoner: We don't have a subway here, So it's like fuck it

Protestant Priest: damn. got it. well, thanks for the interview. your drunken mind have drifted too fucking far.

Stoner: Better be god damn thanks. Its too far as it is. If you want one when i'm sober it won't be any different, I type straight either way. ish.

Protestant Priest: Nah this is cool. Enjoy the night. piece

Stoner: The awkward moment when you're sober and I'm half cut and you can't spell peace...

Protestant Priest: [Image: skype-emoticon0107-sweating.gif] aye aye aye.


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In the News this Week:

Mujica and marijuana - Uruguay is soon to become the world's first country to fully legalise cannabis.

Gutter oil - Illicit recycling of waste cooking oil is a growing problem in China.

Such discovery - Scientists reveal much information about why doge wags his tail. Wow.

Werewolf Child - Child born in central India with hereditary 'Werewolf Syndrome'.

Girl sells virginity for 100,000 Roubles - An 18 year old Siberian girl sold her virginity on an online auction site for 100,000 roubles.


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"I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party." - Ron White


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How bent is your perception of reality? Masks and Deception raises the bar a bit higher. You may need to remove your own mask to fathom this one.


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Source files
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Editor-In-Chief:
Protestant Priest

Managing Editor:
Svarog

Journalists:
Svarog - Sports News/QOTW (Quote of the Week)
Protestant Priest - TOTW/Headlines/Award News/World News/ Interviews/User News
Emrys Rezal Tsathokkua - World News

Graphical Editor
Protestant Priest

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11-06-2013, 11:58 PM
Post: #2
Your grimoire'll be the second grimoire I'll ever be paying for nigga. Just fo scan it u_u Also the interview was awesome :3 ah and wow. such discovery much emrys. so rezal wow such world news

I will make mine arrows drunk with blood, and my sword shall devour flesh; and that with the blood of the slain and of the captives, from the beginning of revenges upon the enemy.
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11-07-2013, 12:57 AM
Post: #3
Hahahahaha epic interview.

You sold your soul to me, need I remind you?

Occult Coaching & Spiritual Services
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11-07-2013, 01:33 AM
Post: #4
"Such discovery - Scientists reveal much information about why doge wags his tail. Wow."

Haha Tounge

So no longer pretend
That you can't feel it near
That tickle on your hand
That tingle in your ear
Oh ask it anything
Because it loves you dear
It's your most precious king
If only you could hear
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11-07-2013, 04:51 AM
Post: #5
(11-06-2013 11:58 PM)Dantresh Wrote:  Your grimoire'll be the second grimoire I'll ever be paying for nigga. Just fo scan it u_u Also the interview was awesome :3 ah and wow. such discovery much emrys. so rezal wow such world news

What was the first?

Forcing your good intentions on others is no different from an evil act.
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11-07-2013, 06:17 AM
Post: #6
Yeah, Stoner is something.

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11-07-2013, 07:07 AM
Post: #7
(11-07-2013 04:51 AM)Divine Darkness Wrote:  
(11-06-2013 11:58 PM)Dantresh Wrote:  Your grimoire'll be the second grimoire I'll ever be paying for nigga. Just fo scan it u_u Also the interview was awesome :3 ah and wow. such discovery much emrys. so rezal wow such world news

What was the first?

Charnel Whispers

I will make mine arrows drunk with blood, and my sword shall devour flesh; and that with the blood of the slain and of the captives, from the beginning of revenges upon the enemy.
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11-07-2013, 07:10 AM
Post: #8
(11-07-2013 07:07 AM)Dantresh Wrote:  
(11-07-2013 04:51 AM)Divine Darkness Wrote:  
(11-06-2013 11:58 PM)Dantresh Wrote:  Your grimoire'll be the second grimoire I'll ever be paying for nigga. Just fo scan it u_u Also the interview was awesome :3 ah and wow. such discovery much emrys. so rezal wow such world news

What was the first?

Charnel Whispers

Damn it. I want that one, but it's kind of expensive...

Forcing your good intentions on others is no different from an evil act.
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11-07-2013, 07:15 AM
Post: #9
(11-07-2013 07:10 AM)Divine Darkness Wrote:  
(11-07-2013 07:07 AM)Dantresh Wrote:  
(11-07-2013 04:51 AM)Divine Darkness Wrote:  What was the first?

Charnel Whispers

Damn it. I want that one, but it's kind of expensive...

it was %50 off on halloween

I will make mine arrows drunk with blood, and my sword shall devour flesh; and that with the blood of the slain and of the captives, from the beginning of revenges upon the enemy.
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11-07-2013, 07:16 AM
Post: #10
(11-07-2013 07:15 AM)Dantresh Wrote:  
(11-07-2013 07:10 AM)Divine Darkness Wrote:  
(11-07-2013 07:07 AM)Dantresh Wrote:  Charnel Whispers

Damn it. I want that one, but it's kind of expensive...

it was %50 off on halloween

Damn it! Well, maybe next halloween.

Forcing your good intentions on others is no different from an evil act.
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