How to identify a force which does not want to reveal her name?

[Wintruz]

I have tried for many years to find a resolution to what I am about to ask, though I am now almost certain that an answer is not coming until it's "meant" to come. I think it's probable that this force doesn't want me to conceptualise her but I'm all for retaining an open mind...

A strong, external female force has been attached to me for as long as I can remember but I cannot identify her. There are particular forms she takes which appear as patterns and images in intense bursts and then she vanishes. For a while I approached this power under the form of Venus/Aphrodite and the alluring aspect of Venus/Aphrodite does resonate but there are other dimensions to this energy which are quite different. Unlike Venus, this is not a sexual energy in the physical sense but the attraction of mystery is closely associated with her, that idea of Goethe's that the "eternal feminine draws us on” or the older idea of Runa. If Venus/Aphrodite is The Empress, this power is The High Priestess although the lunar goddesses behind The High Priestess also do not quite fit. This is no motherly, maiden or war-like energy either. This energy is very adult and womanly, not girl, not grandmother.

Some years ago now, her unclear appearances in visions and dreams reached such a level of intensity that I described her presence to someone who didn't have any manner of magical background. He responded with "That sounds like Greta Garbo". He wasn't wrong. I watched footage of Garbo and immediately perceived something similar creeping through the actress' face, as if what audiences in the 20s saw in that actress was the same energy as I was perceiving. For a few nights afterwards, this power appeared to me in dreams with the face of Greta Garbo. She would never speak, only wink with her right eye and then vanish. Years after that, I explained this energy to a friend with some magical background. She replied "That sounds like Morgana le Fay". I started researching Morgana le Fay and precisely the same thing happened as with Garbo; appearances in dreams and in my mind's eye under the guise of Morgana le Fay but never a word spoken, just intense Presence. A similar dream experience occurred with the face of the Evil Queen from Disney's Snow White. It is unmistakably the same power using these images and causing them to appear seemingly everywhere before vanishing.

The most dramatic moment came during a DMT trip six years ago which was occurring exactly as all others had occurred until she appeared and looked straight into me. Her face was covered, though not in a veil or burqa but something close to a ninja's face covering; a low hood and a mouth covering, all in dark blue. I knew immediately that is was the same power in a new guise and said "Please tell me who you are". She put her finger to her lip as if to say "It's a Secret", then she winked and I blacked out.

For a while, I thought this was a kind of mental synthesis of various elements. As time has gone by, I am increasingly certain that this is a real force that is making herself known.

Does anyone have any recommendations for engaging with a power that does not want to be identified like this? Does anyone have a folkloric insight that I might be overlooking? All help gratefully received.

 

[Xenophon]

You might try, "May I call you _______?" Greta Garbo, Morgana la Fay, or aught else that seems to---very roughly---fit.

My rationale is this. You said the entity did adopt the face of the above named. And think of your magick identity. Most of us adopt a magick name at some point. And at certain junctures, another name will seem to come nearer the mark of who we are. (I'm on my second such name.) So all you need is something relatively stable that keeps communication open. The name you use is not intended to "identify" the entity here so much as it is a bridge to communications.

Another tack: Lon Michael DuQuette outlined a method for getting demons' names. I think he made a (rough) square of the alphabet: 5 letters by 5, with one row having 6. Then one uses a pendulum and asks, "How many letters are in the name? Two? Three?..." That answered, go on. "Is the first letter in Row 1? Row 2? Having gotten the row, one goes letter by letter: "Is the letter ______?"

I know, this sounds as awkward as a bear cub dry-humping a rugby ball, but the one time I used it I got a pronounceable name that the entity responded to. This might not be the being's "real" name; it serves to facilitate communications is all.

Reading your post "Die Lorelei" popped into mind, but this entity does not seem inimical to you.

 

[HoldAll]

There was a discussion of 'occult eyes' that also has a picture of Garbo in it (personally, I think it was just a style of photography/cinematography that was popular at the time):

Kaoz Cache 4 - Occult Eyes

This is an article i wrote up dated at 2018, an article is a stretch since i had no intention for it as such But the obsession and dive into the rabbit hole was no joke. And it's high time i made marks in this section... Anyway, i can't be bothered to style and add fluff, on account that im...

wizardforums.com

You don't seem all that troubled by that being, merely puzzled, so it's not like some sort of obsession or haunting, I'd say. Would you agree that she is trying to teach you something or acquaint you with some spiritual principle you're not familiar with yet? Alright, this line of inquiry leads straight to Jung's concept of the Anima but any conventional psychologization of this phenomenon is probably not the answer for such a mystical experience that defies simple categorization/classification. Jung himself would be stumped if he had to find a convenient archetype label for her the way you describe her. Do you sense any intent or purpose behind her apparitions at all?

 

[Yazata]

Based only on your interests in vampirism and the different "incarnations" of this female entity, who comes under various names, I'm thinking about Exorial from the Fraternitas Saturni.
The cover of the book has her seal. Maybe that could be a way to approach it?

 

[Mannimarco]

Does anyone have any recommendations for engaging with a power that does not want to be identified like this?

Very interesting situation. Personally I would not be willing to engage with her without identification. If she really doesn't want to be identified, it might be pretty hard to do so. You could inquire of another entity you have a relationship with, but a lot of entities seem to keep each other's secrets. If you can journey to the akashic records, you might be able to find some helpful info there. If she's not opposing you in any way, just dropping it and letting her tell you when she's ready is probably fine.

It could be that she wants you to find out who she is, being all mysterious so you'll pursue her. That would not be outside of the realm of possibilities, especially with a feminine presenting entity.

 

[Wintruz]

You might try, "May I call you _______?" Greta Garbo, Morgana la Fay, or aught else that seems to---very roughly---fit.

I have attempted a few things similar to this, including a ritual based on the correspondences which seemed to fit and calling upon "You who have looked at me through the masques of the enchantress Morgana and the actress Garbo..."

Nothing. If I'm evoking a force, I will feel something after a while, but the more I called, the stronger was the sense that I was talking to an empty room. Yet when she does appear, it's unmistakable. This is a very strong Presence. My feeling is that the channel for communication is open only one way; I cannot reach her but she can appear to me. I also get a sense that vocal language isn't quite the right approach to her, that something more "telepathic" is appropriate. I see no pattern in the timing of her appearances.

However, I will use the DuQuette method you outline (and for which I thank you) as I don't think there's anything to lose.

Reading your post "Die Lorelei" popped into mind, but this entity does not seem inimical to you.

It is very likely that you're picking up something here. Femme fatale qualities are definitely present and there are dimensions which I see in the Sirens, Circe and even a little in Eve. There's more...

On the Spring Equinox 2019, I had my runes read by an experienced, gifted reader. She discerned something and started talking about there being a mysterious female presence "that's drawing you into things". As soon as she said this I knew what the reader was talking about but said nothing other than "What do you think it is?". She said "I think it's very frightening". Now, granted, what this nice, older New Age lady finds frightening or worth engaging with will likely be rather different from me, so I didn't start worrying about cutting ties. I left the reader's shop and walked outside as a car drove passed playing (in 2019!) "She'll be coming round the mountain when she comes". Even I wondered at that moment. Which brings me to...

You don't seem all that troubled by that being, merely puzzled, so it's not like some sort of obsession or haunting, I'd say. Would you agree that she is trying to teach you something or acquaint you with some spiritual principle you're not familiar with yet? Alright, this line of inquiry leads straight to Jung's concept of the Anima but any conventional psychologization of this phenomenon is probably not the answer for such a mystical experience that defies simple categorization/classification. Jung himself would be stumped if he had to find a convenient archetype label for her the way you describe her. Do you sense any intent or purpose behind her apparitions at all?

In keeping with the Siren energy mentioned above, I suppose if this force meant me harm, she would appear alluring rather than destructive. So there is a definite sense of uncertainty there, not in how she appears but because of what she might really want. If I had to intuit a purpose, I would say that the seductive aspects are not sexual but are about seducing me into new occult knowledge (not intellectual knowledge - there isn't a trace of Minerva in this force) or a different state of consciousness. In other words, I think the objective is spiritual. Equally it could be that she is playing with me and wants to lead me to annihilation. Or both. I once felt shades of this force in Crowley's description of Babalon beckoning the Adepts through the Abyss and into the City of Pyramids. The reasons I thought Babalon was not quite a right fit were the same as those of Aphrodite; those goddesses are open and unveiled and this is very much a veiled figure.

Based only on your interests in vampirism and the different "incarnations" of this female entity, who comes under various names, I'm thinking about Exorial from the Fraternitas Saturni.
The cover of the book has her seal. Maybe that could be a way to approach it?

I am not familiar with this work but I have deep respect for what I do know of Gregor A. Gregorius so I will research deeper. Thank you.

Apropos the above "femme fatale" qualities, there is a strong vampyric dimension here. When the Garbo conversation occurred I was interested to learn that Garbo was one of the first public figures to be labelled a "vamp".

If she's not opposing you in any way, just dropping it and letting her tell you when she's ready is probably fine.

It could be that she wants you to find out who she is, being all mysterious so you'll pursue her.

I reached a point a little while ago where I concluded that there was no way I could discover a name without her disclosing it. I did wonder whether perhaps this is the true face or most elevated form of my Daemon; there have been other signposts on the way which I've united with but perhaps this is the "force behind those forces". I really am mystified but I sense she's attached to me at the deepest level.

Thank you all for excellent perspectives.

 

[Shaman]

You can seek help from another practitioner with a spirit. He can send his spirit to you to find out and then his spirit tells him who your spirit is. This is how I found out my succubus is actually a Djinn instead.