[Help] Doors, breach & black insects/spiders

[Magpie]

Tell me what you believe the nature of dreams is and help me understand what has been happening to me, if you find it interesting.

Over the last few years I had dreams with a recurring theme of the doors of my flat or other flats/houses that I was supposed to live in. This always included an attempted or successful breach. From knocking, wailing to bursting in. Trying to lock the door and seeing the lock being ineffective. Also sometimes no intrusion, but awareness, that someone entered before. Finding hidden doors and vast wings of the place that I did not see before. Also, opening eyes to see the door open, only to wake up and see they are closed. Long story short, something wanting in and being successful at it. It was almost always paired up with the feeling of terror. Once, at one of the peaks of those, I actually had a very odd attempted intrusion. Someone had the key and was opening the door, but I stopped them. I contacted the letting agency. First they said they didn't know about it but then clarified that the guy was supposed to survey an empty flat and must have picked up my key by accident.

Starting around a year ago, I have had a few instances of seeing black insects or spiders after waking up. Once I saw a black wasp on the bed. It went flying as I jumped of the bed. Another time a big black spider was on my leg and as I jumped it was thrown on the wall and then fizzled out. It happened a few more time. I didn't use to have such experiences. I can think of one or two similar situations where the boundry of sleep and waking state got mixed up, but they were not threatening or disgusting.

I don't sleep well. Some nights I wake up every 2-3 hours. Even if I don't I don't feel fresh after waking up. I really feels like something is taking my energy and those black insects/spiders got me thinking.

Any helpful suggestions highly appreciated!

 

[whome]

It looks like you have dark entities attached:

• back of pelvis
• front of pelvis
• front of heart
• back of head
• top of forehead
• base of spine
• .......

Are you giving them permission by:

• allowing adverse thoughts/feelings?
• taking/using improper (unclean) substances?
• living in a place with dark energies?
• avoiding making reparation for wrong-doing?
• etc

 

[stalkinghyena]

Doors can be symbolic of the liminal passages between worlds. In a dream, you could say, you are already standing on the cusp of those worlds. Terror in these experiences is actually quite natural as such liminal symbolism threatens the established ego's sense of order and regularity. The frequency of such dreams could imply an innate sensitivity to transitional states of consciousness. You could, with introspection, find ways of making use of this.

Now I am speaking a particular occult perspective - obviously if you health issues (sleep issues, anxiety etc.) then you should attend to those appropriately.

Insects, spiders and so on are emblems related to more primal layers of the brain, portions of consciousness that are more basic and could be described as "elemental". Though they may cause fright, they can also reveal certain levels of knowledge with the right kind of interrogations. The symbolism of the deep mind is layered, and even from apparent "evil" signatures can arise "beneficial" forces once they have a chance to evolve. Don't be fooled by the drama of what you see - analyze it in detail. What could a spider "fizzling out" signify on a personal level.

If you are into astrology, you might want to look at how Scorpio is configured in your natal chart - the house it is in (6, 8 and 12 can be tough), if any planets are there and what their relation is to the current positions. The reason is that in its lowest energy form the sign of Scorpio is related to deeper predatory elements trying through great struggle to attain to higher tones of awareness - but how these play out takes deep and intense examination, and Scorpio has a certain relationship to inner pain that one might almost say defines it. If that's not your thing, disregard.


(Speaking as one who is happy to "give permission" myself, I have a couple of good back massagers to help with pelvic conditions, &etc. Occasionally I get whiplashed. Because I deserve it.)

 

[Magpie]

Thank you both, I appreciate your responses. As a disclaimer, I don't have sleep issues. I fall asleep pretty fast. Waking up is annoying, but even on sleeping pills I got at some point from the doctors I would wake up. And they made me mildly hallucinating before falling asleep... Mattress is good, pillows etc all fine.

Your responses point me into different directions - are those phenomena caused by internal (stalkinghyena) or external (whome) forces?

Whome - I only saw them on my legs, so not near the chakras, but you can say maybe they managed to run there before my consciousness properly woke up. I would say that I am pretty far as long as detachment is concerned, so even if adverse thoughts/feelings appear, they do not bother me and go away quickly. Not sure what substances you mean, but I am not on drugs and I didn't even drink in months. Don't know if that building has any bad energies and as far as reparations go - that is kind of difficult as as. What counts as wrongdoing? What is enough to be considered a reparation? etc

If it is really the case and I have something on me, I think it would have to be with me for long years to be honest, I mean early teens. Do I get rid of it or do I somehow absorb it? I live a pretty boring, disciplined life. Only the worst junkie demon would find this saturating...

Stalkinghyena - It does indeed feel like passing into a different realm. Often in those dreams I am in a house/flat and go through a door that open up rooms I have never seen and it makes me wonder if they were always there. It is in an atmosphere of vast emptiness and "otherness". But those are the dreams when I pass through the doors. The dreams that worried me where the ones when someone was passing through the door into my house/flat.

Are you saying that those insects and spiders are parts of me? Could you please point me to a book where I can learn about how to interrogate and interpret those things. They are not even scary in a sense those door breaches are - it is just a momentary jump that is normal, if you see something crawling on you. While we are at book recommendations, any good astrology book? I would like to get into it, but the amount of BS books on that subject is too intimidating,

 

[whome]

I only saw them on my legs, so not near the chakras

I was describing the entities I see on you.

Such entities are very common in the human population. They come to feed off the human and are sent to ensure that the human does not become spiritually useful for the planet

Etheric technology is also used by various groups - e.g. etheric implant on top of the head

Post automatically merged: Saturday at 11:35 AM

What counts as wrongdoing?

Conscious activity contrary to the intent of the being that uses the solar system as its body of incarnation

Unconscious contrary activity is also a problem but at least the human is not using its free will to damage the greater system

 

[Magpie]

I was describing the entities I see on you.

Such entities are very common in the human population. They come to feed off the human and are sent to ensure that the human does not become spiritually useful for the planet

Etheric technology is also used by various groups - e.g. etheric implant on top of the head

What would you suggest I do?

 

[Doorman]

My interpretation: you are stuck on 2 worlds it seems, one of the conscious, the other is the unconscious. However, it may no be spiritual. Do you spent a lot of time on the internet? The internet is a form of collective unconscious projection. Either way, you struggle to find balance between these two worlds. The unconscious is constantly "invading" your life, and even though you try to set boundries, you ultimately fail.

What makes my very suspicious about this being the internet problem is the fact you saw a spider. You are literally "caught" in the spider "Web". There is a lot of symbloic meaning that correlates spiders with the internet "web". How they caught or attention and how we feel trapped by it. It also known to be very hard to set boundries, as the internet influences our lives more and more as time pass on...

As for the wasp: it is a symbol for aggression, but also control over one's life. It's a sign that you need to be more aggressive and assertive in your life. It's even said that some wasps hunt spiders, perhaps thats something you should do. Channel your rage and fight to keep your boundries. That's my advice for you!

 

[stalkinghyena]

@Magpie the quote function is not working for me right now, so I will try to address your queries as best I can.

I am not saying that these forms are purely "internal" or that there are not "external" forces that you are encountering in the "breaches". This is a tricky distinction which you really have to flesh out yourself in a very deep space "within" - you might say in the "places" where you are most vulnerable. In visionary-dream terms the "conscious self" can't really make a solid distinction between real and unreal - and this is made stranger by the fact that in the spiritual realms such distinctions don't apply as they do in the realm of "matter". The fear-shock mechanisms of waking life, with its daily threats wants to interpret the "violation" of the sleep world as something ominous and impending. But this is something that has to be endured with open eyes and and a firm intention of will.

One way to look at is that your imagination is like an antenna, but that does not mean that astral spiders are hunting you or you are suffering from psychic home invasion. It means that you are given symbols to decode that can bring you real knowledge beyond the image. What you have is a puzzle, and fear responses are a part of that puzzle - but if you decide within yourself that you are sovereign, that what you see cannot hurt you, or that it can even serve you, then you are taking steps on the path of magic. To simplify, ask continually of yourself, what is the dream teaching you?

The sense of "otherness and emptiness" are actually important, and there are connective philosophies that can guide in the exploration of this experience. It is not a be all end all or a sign of doom - the sensation is like a door until itself.

As to books, I can point only to some of my own influences, such as Carlos Casteneda (dreams as doors) and Kenneth Grant (he just loves spiders!). These require a certain background of experience I have developed over a long time. What I am guessing might help you is to find a solid cosmogony model - if you do not have one - to give you a "map" against which you can apply your experiences. Interrogate yourself and the map - put yourself in the map. Astrology is an example of such a model - and it actually connects to other models across various systems.
If I recall correctly, in another thread you defined yourself as a "witch" - this should be your baseline. My baseline is roughly "Hermetic" and Kabbalistic, but "psychic" skill sets in terms of personal will may have a particular preference which will call the right books to you.

For a good astrology book, you are right, most of them are BS in that they often are too focused on the calculations or they are beset with a modern "psychology based" approach rife with notions of moral-karmic evolution. It's not that this is inherently worthless, it's more of a distraction. But if I were pressed on a book that helped me in past years, it would be Cosmic Astrology by Isabelle M. Hickey. It's not great for me, but it was the best I could find in print that covered the meanings I was looking for that others didn't.
What really helped me is exploring Chris Brennan's Astrology Podcast. Hearing multiple views from different practitioners opened some doors for me. Here's a breadcrumb:

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It's practically stock in trade to recommend keeping a journal of your dream experiences, if you have not done so. I would say find ways to study symbolism. Don't take them at face value either - there is what so and so says a door means and what a door feels like to you. A lot of this is like learning to speak a certain kind of language where meanings are shifting and seem arbitrary until they eventually "line up". Then you will know what to do.

@Doorman, some of what you just posted reminds me a little of Pete Carrol's observations in his Q&A with Angela Pucha. The influence of mass consciousness via the internet is definitely a phenomenon that has been a concern of my own for a long time. I think the internet's influence on spirituality is a worthy study to pursue - but yes, it's a sticky web.

 

[Yazata]

don't sleep well

I can only advise you to get rested. Make sure you are comfortable in your home, that your locks work (maybe replace them) and / or place a chair or something in front of your door. This is mostly to make you feel safer so that you are able to relax.
The insects you see after waking up, that dissolved, seem to suggest that you were still partially asleep. Not the most exciting mystical answer - I know.

As for the mysterious "who me?" that told you that he was

describing the entities I see on you.

That guy sees black octopuses everywhere, so they are very likely on his own eyeballs.

 

[Magpie]

My interpretation: you are stuck on 2 worlds it seems, one of the conscious, the other is the unconscious. However, it may no be spiritual. Do you spent a lot of time on the internet? The internet is a form of collective unconscious projection. Either way, you struggle to find balance between these two worlds. The unconscious is constantly "invading" your life, and even though you try to set boundries, you ultimately fail.

(cropping response quotes to make it more readable) It is an interesting angle - spiders and webs being a symbol for the internet. Indeed, internet is a source of contamination. Thank you for pointing that out. I need to focus more on it. Black wasps paralyze spiders and make them living nutrients for their offspring. Terrific correlation to make! Is your analysis purely psychological or do you imply a more esoteric meaning to these things? In order words, are those projections just imprints of other people's thoughts, feelings etc on my psyche or are these occult energies?

The sense of "otherness and emptiness" are actually important, and there are connective philosophies that can guide in the exploration of this experience. It is not a be all end all or a sign of doom - the sensation is like a door until itself.

I am not a witch, that was a joke. I also have Hermetic background (Evola and Ur Group works) and I see what you mean by mapping myself against their model. As soulless as it sounds. Thank you for all recommendations - I will have a close look. Being worthless as a source is better than being a distraction in my view! I agree that to tell internal and external apart is hard enough from the perspective of person affected by the phenomena, not to mention someone outside. I may be disconnected enough so that elements of me feel "external"... No easy answers.

I don't think I would be a target for an attack by another practitioner, but I suppose there is always a risk of entities attacking spontaneously?

That guy sees black octopuses everywhere, so they are very likely on his own eyeballs.

Thanks. Haha, it is difficult to differentiate between a shitpost and a valid response in an area like this. If you see a black spider or wasp, why not see a black octopus next? This guy has a different account, I saw those octopus talks before. Is it deliberate trolling?

 

[Doorman]

Is your analysis purely psychological or do you imply a more esoteric meaning to these things? In order words, are those projections just imprints of other people's thoughts, feelings etc on my psyche or are these occult energies?

I just came up with this interpertation sponteneously. I was always very good with dream interpretations.
However, I think you got it wrong. This is not an external power. Dreams come from within your mind. It is something internal that is making itself know to your conscious mind.
In my view (many can disagree with me) this is a call to action from your unconscious mind begging you to make a change. Yes its psychological, but many occult entities can also be a reflection of psychological feelings you may be experiencing. The important part here is to know that this is an internal feeling you have that is being expressed by your dream

 

[Magpie]

I just came up with this interpertation sponteneously. I was always very good with dream interpretations.
However, I think you got it wrong. This is not an external power. Dreams come from within your mind. It is something internal that is making itself know to your conscious mind.
In my view (many can disagree with me) this is a call to action from your unconscious mind begging you to make a change. Yes its psychological, but many occult entities can also be a reflection of psychological feelings you may be experiencing. The important part here is to know that this is an internal feeling you have that is being expressed by your dream

I was not saying it was an external or internal power - I was just asking a question. Some texts I read, which I believe, say those "ghosts" or apparitions have a specific meaning and they represent a thought, a feeling etc. They are like riddles in that interpretation. And you can view them as impersonal and universal - since they are not specific to you. We could say they are part of collective unconscious.

 

[stalkinghyena]

but I suppose there is always a risk of entities attacking spontaneously?

When dealing with the unknown there are always risks, so an important question should be a matter of self defense. There are plenty of threads, books, etc. that cover banishing/protection and so on. But let's just say it comes down to "your will" vs. and "alien force" and whether one can recognize one's power in the moment and put a foot down.
I take it as a mortal rule that with any survival situation, the first thing to crush is panic.

(Evola and Ur Group works)

Interesting you should bring them up considering the re-surfacing of the old "octopus doctrine" here. I recall a certain gripe from UR regarding "counter initiation" as an insidious and conspiratorial historical force. As I interpret this it is meant to point to deceptively "soothing" philosophies that result in disempowerment of the individual seeker and the denial of the heroic quest through the smoke and mirrors of vain interpretations.

But every philosophy and approach seems to have a "carrot and stick" element to it. UR's struck me as particularly ur-gent. In particular Evola's notion that if you fail, you will be punished severely, which is reminiscent of Levi's references to the poison "shirt of Nessus". Hercules, to purify himself from narcotic sensuality, must burn himself alive.

 

[Magpie]

When dealing with the unknown there are always risks, so an important question should be a matter of self defense. There are plenty of threads, books, etc. that cover banishing/protection and so on. But let's just say it comes down to "your will" vs. and "alien force" and whether one can recognize one's power in the moment and put a foot down.
I take it as a mortal rule that with any survival situation, the first thing to crush is panic.


Interesting you should bring them up considering the re-surfacing of the old "octopus doctrine" here. I recall a certain gripe from UR regarding "counter initiation" as an insidious and conspiratorial historical force. As I interpret this it is meant to point to deceptively "soothing" philosophies that result in disempowerment of the individual seeker and the denial of the heroic quest through the smoke and mirrors of vain interpretations.

But every philosophy and approach seems to have a "carrot and stick" element to it. UR's struck me as particularly ur-gent. In particular Evola's notion that if you fail, you will be punished severely, which is reminiscent of Levi's references to the poison "shirt of Nessus". Hercules, to purify himself from narcotic sensuality, must burn himself alive.

Perhaps I should do a banishing ritual just in case. I am not familiar with 'octopus doctrine', but from bringing pieces together I suppose it is some sort of malicious force meant to soothe and disempower people? That is not what I feel at all personally. The essay on counter initiation (introduction to magic vol 1) is the only one I read on this topic. denial of the heroic quest and soothing philosophies are one aspect of it, but there are many more. I would say that the most prominent type is, in their words, doctrines that lead to subconsciousness and subsensitivity as opposed to initiatic superconscioussness. Psychoanalysts, mediums, theosophisits and spiritualists get the most criticism. But that is a different topic. You are right that the person who dares and fails is punished severely, but I wonder where is the point of no return, initatic Rubicon if you will, after which you either succeed or you get struck down.