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[Help] Keep/Bind someone in my life to me?

Someone's asking for help!

ArtaSinn

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This might be the wrong place and if so, Sorry! So sorry! But I was wondering if anyone could help me find a spell to bind someone in my life, like so they can't leave? A little background if it helps, I just got out of a rough relationship, that spanned a year with someone who I initially was very in love with. But a lot happened in that year and after a fight I decided to leave. BUT I don't want this person gone from my life while I heal, and check out other options. So if anyone has a method, or spirit they can point me towards that can help with this? I'm open to any and all suggestions!
 

Mart

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It's good that you're open to all suggestions, because you need to be aware that your chosen path might not be a good one.
Why do you feel like you need to bind another person and force them to act a certain way?
It's not that it can't be done, but it can end up being detrimental for every person involved.
Have you done any divination on the matter? You might end up messing things up even more for yourself if you're not careful.
 

ArtaSinn

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It's good that you're open to all suggestions, because you need to be aware that your chosen path might not be a good one.
Why do you feel like you need to bind another person and force them to act a certain way?
It's not that it can't be done, but it can end up being detrimental for every person involved.
Have you done any divination on the matter? You might end up messing things up even more for yourself if you're not careful.
Why might it not be good, or better put, but why/how would it be detrimental? Is it the rule of three? I have not done any divination yet, I'm not too good at reading for myself, and the person who usually helped me is the person I am trying to keep in my life :x. I don't want to be with them right now, but I REALLY want them to stay in my life I know its selfish but isn't a lot of the craft? He means so much to me, we have wonderful conversations and I still enjoy talking to him. I just want to explore other options, I know this other guy I really like who also likes me. I just don't want to lose my ex over this.
 

Mart

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First and foremost - before attempting something like bindings, learn your basics first. Divination is one of those essentials that no occultist can ever overlook. You won't get anywhere without a solid foundation.
Second - live and let live. Some things are meant to happen, some just aren't. If you start going around binding people and fucking with their path as well as your own, you might end up ruining things for everyone, especially yourself.
You can influence things as a practitioner, but not all things should be altered. Before every action you should always divine to collect more information about the situation at hand and current influences, then meditate on it. Same goes for any and all workings you start contemplating.
There is wisdom in knowing when to act, just as much as when not to.
You seem to already recognize that your whims are selfish, which is exactly why you should do some introspection, instead of hotheadedly acting on them.
It's not always about getting what we want either, as that might not be what we (or other people) need.
 

ArtaSinn

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First and foremost - before attempting something like bindings, learn your basics first. Divination is one of those essentials that no occultist can ever overlook. You won't get anywhere without a solid foundation.
Second - live and let live. Some things are meant to happen, some just aren't. If you start going around binding people and fucking with their path as well as your own, you might end up ruining things for everyone, especially yourself.
You can influence things as a practitioner, but not all things should be altered. Before every action you should always divine to collect more information about the situation at hand and current influences, then meditate on it. Same goes for any and all workings you start contemplating.
There is wisdom in knowing when to act, just as much as when not to.
You seem to already recognize that your whims are selfish, which is exactly why you should do some introspection, instead of hotheadedly acting on them.
It's not always about getting what we want either, as that might not be what we (or other people) need.
I think you're right. I guess I'll try doing a divination pull with my tarot deck. Though, after that. If I decide I still want to do it. What would be a good starting point for doing so any spells, or entities I can petition? Its just hard keeping him in my life otherwise. He seems like he wants to go because I can't be what he wants me to be because I have eyes on someone else. But I really don't want to lose him! Ugh I don't make any sense, things seem more simple when I type them out. I know we can't always get what we want, But I'd be sad if I lost him. I just don't think I can ever be what he wants again after what happened.
 

Mart

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In general, binding isn't something fit to start messing with, as a beginner.
Good starting point for any new practitioner is introspection, meditation, concentration and breathing exercises. Start your inner development before toying with other people's lives. Also don't ever try to be what someone else wants you to be. If they don't appreciate you being in their life, they aren't worth your time or effort. It's better to loose someone dear, than keep them in your life and have them actively resent you (which is one of the potential outcomes of binding someone to you).
You seem young, keep in mind that part of maturing in mind is learning to let go of things. Approach it as a lesson that needs to be learned.
Feeling sad is one part of life, you will need to learn how to deal with a lot more later on. :p
 

ArtaSinn

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I guess part of me knows all that, But I still want to. Is that wrong? To want to go through with it still knowing all that?
Don't worry though I have no intentions of molding myself to anyone, I just really don't want to lose this person. I know he just wants to try and fix things, but I don't. I just want him as a friend even if I have to do this. :x I'm not sure if he'd ever resent me though, he claims to really love me. So I thought Binding would be nice.
I'm fairly old, just young at mind! hehe. But I take you can't offer any direction for me to move in for binding? I understand if so.
 

Mart

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If you just want them as a friend then binding is definitely the wrong approach. It sounds to me like you want to change the type of relationship, which is a different kind of work. If this person wants a romantic relationship and you don't, then binding is the last thing you need. It would likely make them overly clingy and it isn't healthy for anyone. Besides, it's no way to treat a friend.
What might work better in this case is perhaps petitioning spirits of Venusian nature, or deities that deal with relationships, romance and love in general, like Aphrodite. You can ask them to extinguish that person's romantic feelings and let them befriend you instead. This would be a much better approach I think.
 

ArtaSinn

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Even if we once discussed binding in the past? Would it still be bad? We had talked about binding our love at one point and he was ok with it. I'm that if I was to extinguish his love like that, what if he just leaves then. I really want to avoid losing them in my life. But I also don't want to chase ya know?
 

Lemongrass00

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This might be the wrong place and if so, Sorry! So sorry! But I was wondering if anyone could help me find a spell to bind someone in my life, like so they can't leave? A little background if it helps, I just got out of a rough relationship, that spanned a year with someone who I initially was very in love with. But a lot happened in that year and after a fight I decided to leave. BUT I don't want this person gone from my life while I heal, and check out other options. So if anyone has a method, or spirit they can point me towards that can help with this? I'm open to any and all suggestions!
Maybe don’t try and take away people’s free will.
 

Mart

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Even if we once discussed binding in the past? Would it still be bad? We had talked about binding our love at one point and he was ok with it. I'm that if I was to extinguish his love like that, what if he just leaves then. I really want to avoid losing them in my life. But I also don't want to chase ya know?
Look, I'm just going to put it this way - from the questions you ask and your overall atitude, you're clearly not ready for any kind of binding work. It's best to move on from that thought. What I said was "extinguish his romantic feelings" and added that you can ask to replace them with bonds of friendship. Please pay attention. ;)
This kind of work is of much lighter nature and is overall better suited in your case. I see no point in obsessing over binding when it's not necessary and doesn't even fit the situation at hand.
 

Scottish_Pride

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Maybe don’t try and take away people’s free will.
Ditto. That tends to rarely go well, because they will fight back on at least an unconscious level. Backfiring or "monkey's paw" situations aren't unheard of for this reason. Same thing applies with person-specific love spells in general.
 

ArtaSinn

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Look, I'm just going to put it this way - from the questions you ask and your overall atitude, you're clearly not ready for any kind of binding work. It's best to move on from that thought. What I said was "extinguish his romantic feelings" and added that you can ask to replace them with bonds of friendship. Please pay attention. ;)
This kind of work is of much lighter nature and is overall better suited in your case. I see no point in obsessing over binding when it's not necessary and doesn't even fit the situation at hand.
I can try to move on, Could you provide a good method for petitioning spirits of Venusian nature? Also what should I do if petitioning Venusian spirits doesn't work? :c
 

ArtaSinn

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Ditto. That tends to rarely go well, because they will fight back on at least an unconscious level. Backfiring or "monkey's paw" situations aren't unheard of for this reason. Same thing applies with person-specific love spells in general.
Fight back how? You mean like being combative? Or Sabotaging relationships?
 

Mart

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The specifics will be different for each practitioner according to their tradition and path, so if you work within the context of wicca, pull the general working template from that. Constructing your own rituals is another one of essential skills you need to practice.
Best do it on the planetary day and hour of Venus.
Goes without saying that you need to cleanse the space beforehand and do a reading about the outcome if your work.
Do all the usual proper preparations, then concentrate on your intent and call for a specific spirit or deity. You can lay out your request on a piece of paper, but you do need to focus on the outcome either way. You should prepare some kind of an offering, fit for the entity you're calling for help, do the research beforehand to find out what that is. If for whatever reason you feel like the entity didnt show up or the ritual failed, try it again a ttime or two. The spirits might be simply refusing to work with you on this, always do a reading what the situation is and what your next course of action should be. Hope this helps, good luck.
 

Scottish_Pride

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A knee-jerk reaction.
To elaborate, peoples’ subconscious minds often have a way of protecting a person to a degree. Even if the person has no conscious magical ability and is unaware that something is happening. This can put a real wrench in the gears, especially for something delicate like a relationship. It’s not uncommon for the person to grow to hate you, even if they don’t know they’re being manipulated.
 

ArtaSinn

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The specifics will be different for each practitioner according to their tradition and path, so if you work within the context of wicca, pull the general working template from that. Constructing your own rituals is another one of essential skills you need to practice.
Best do it on the planetary day and hour of Venus.
Goes without saying that you need to cleanse the space beforehand and do a reading about the outcome if your work.
Do all the usual proper preparations, then concentrate on your intent and call for a specific spirit or deity. You can lay out your request on a piece of paper, but you do need to focus on the outcome either way. You should prepare some kind of an offering, fit for the entity you're calling for help, do the research beforehand to find out what that is. If for whatever reason you feel like the entity didnt show up or the ritual failed, try it again a ttime or two. The spirits might be simply refusing to work with you on this, always do a reading what the situation is and what your next course of action should be. Hope this helps, good luck.
I'll try this then, thank you for all the advice even if I seemed difficult. Hope it works ^-^ if I get no results after a time or two, is it disrespectful to keep asking the same spirit?
 

ArtaSinn

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To elaborate, peoples’ subconscious minds often have a way of protecting a person to a degree. Even if the person has no conscious magical ability and is unaware that something is happening. This can put a real wrench in the gears, especially for something delicate like a relationship. It’s not uncommon for the person to grow to hate you, even if they don’t know they’re being manipulated.
Thank you for Elaborating, this was what I was asking about! I'd really like for him not to hate me...
 

Mart

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I'll try this then, thank you for all the advice even if I seemed difficult. Hope it works ^-^ if I get no results after a time or two, is it disrespectful to keep asking the same spirit?
Glad if I could help. After a few times it might not be a good idea to continue on the same route, yeah. Do a divination then to find a way. Ask the cards for advice if you feel lost. Always divine and contemplate, I'm sure you'll find the answers if you look persistently enough.
 
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