Armchair magic

[Johny111]

"Armchair" magic is quite a neglected branch of magic, and its adepts are largely reserved and mysterious people. They rarely talk or write about their secrets and mostly pass them on orally to those marked by magical power. These so-called practical magicians have great prejudices against "Armchair" magic and have no idea how effective this type of magic is. People are not sufficiently aware of the wonders they can achieve while sitting in their armchair. I discovered the secret of this type of magic during the period of my greatest downfall, when, on one occasion, I simply collapsed into an armchair and did not get up from it for days. After that, miracles followed.

So, the magic of the armchair is not a matter of some kind of conscious choice or affinity, but it is a matter of a fateful vocation. Karma simply threw me into the armchair, where the Spirit revealed this kind of magic to me. The basic premise of "Armchair" magic is the perfect non-doing of anything. And that is not easy to achieve, because that state must be maintained.

At the moment when doing nothing becomes all-encompassing and complete, to the extent that a person does not want to leave that condition, it is then necessary to summon obsession and give oneself over to it. It is necessary to build the feeling that the obsession completely takes over the mental screen, and then our entire being. When the obsession takes over to the point of becoming almost tangible, it is necessary to abruptly rise from the armchair and, with a strong shout accompanied by a bodily gesture, articulate the obsession. All of this happens very quickly and suddenly. It must be so intense that afterwards we fall back into the armchair again.

This method resembles a kind of masturbation with prolonged ejaculation, until the moment when we lose more control over our own physiology. In short, these are the basic instructions for performing armchair magic.

 

[beardedeldridge]

oh oh do one about how a stop sign is really a tree

and make sure to fit a simile in there somewhere

 

[Johny111]

oh oh do one about how a stop sign is really a tree

and make sure to fit a simile in there somewhere

Okay, you caught me, I like to BS a little, but that doesn't mean I completely missed the point. Give me at least a little credit.

 

[beardedeldridge]

Okay, you caught me, I like to BS a little, but that doesn't mean I completely missed the point. Give me at least a little credit.

;-)

Nah I'm mostly just messing with you. I mean you’re sorta taking the phrase and changing its definition a good bit, maybe trying to use it for something other than its normal negative connotation?

tbh there’s nothing wrong with taking the strictly scholarly approach. In the long run it’s mostly personally detrimental to actually practicing but for short time periods it’s not the end of the world. And it does definitely have its usefulness to the community. (That post on planetary magic the other day could have used such input imo.)

-Eld