How to Help Others

[Magpie]

I realised that many people seeking professional help in the form of therapy or anti-depressant medication have issues of spiritual rather than material nature. This is in stark contrast to those affected by more tangible neurological degradations or anomalies. How to help them? My intuition tells me "you can't", but I want to know what you say. Can we somehow inspire them to break away from the anxiety and depression? For context, we are considering close relatives & friends, not strangers.

 

[Ziran]

Can we somehow inspire them to break away from the anxiety and depression?

Yes. Definitely.

How to help them?

In general, this is the way I'm doing it:

Just like any practitioner, it begins with observation, ideally an interview. Collecting signs and symptoms, family history and most important consent. After that it's root-cause-analysis. Then, to put it bluntly, I invoke the root-cause with-in myself in a sort of sand-box and play with it until I've gotten to know it sufficiently to deconstruct it. Once I'm able to deconstruct it for myself, I join the afflicted in their world, and show them how to deconstruct it for themself. Where it differs from conventional therapy is the invocation, the manner in which I am "joining in their world", and the techniques I'm using for deconstruction.

Ultimately, successfully helping people in this way is a function of 3 things:

1. how well the practitioner knows themself
2. how well the practitioner knows the afflicted
3. the number of afflictions known and understood to the extent of deconstructing them

anxiety and depression

In particular, these two, I start looking for trauma. Unresolved painful memories. Metaphorical "inflammation" which is sapping their resources. In the past, many used a "demon possession" model which had some therapeutic benefit. I prefer using an inflammation model instead, but, in function, it's still ... the same "old-religion". The metaphorical "demons" which are afflicting them are metaphorically "named" and metaphorically "banished" over and over again.

 

[Magpie]

Yes. Definitely.



In general, this is the way I'm doing it:

Just like any practitioner, it begins with observation, ideally an interview. Collecting signs and symptoms, family history and most important consent. After that it's root-cause-analysis. Then, to put it bluntly, I invoke the root-cause with-in myself in a sort of sand-box and play with it until I've gotten to know it sufficiently to deconstruct it. Once I'm able to deconstruct it for myself, I join the afflicted in their world, and show them how to deconstruct it for themself. Where it differs from conventional therapy is the invocation, the manner in which I am "joining in their world", and the techniques I'm using for deconstruction.

Ultimately, successfully helping people in this way is a function of 3 things:

1. how well the practitioner knows themself
2. how well the practitioner knows the afflicted
3. the number of afflictions known and understood to the extent of deconstructing them

In particular, these two, I start looking for trauma. Unresolved painful memories. Metaphorical "inflammation" which is sapping their resources. In the past, many used a "demon possession" model which had some therapeutic benefit. I prefer using an inflammation model instead, but, in function, it's still ... the same "old-religion". The metaphorical "demons" which are afflicting them are metaphorically "named" and metaphorically "banished" over and over again.

I can recognise that this is a valuable response. I cannot really reply meaningfully though, as I realised this is above my current skillset.

 

[Clear]

They won't believe you as they've been programmed by the realm to accept what they sell and tell - even though its largely ineffective. Those who came to me for help often did as the last resort when they'd hit rock bottom and nothing else shifted their malaise. After it did they said:

"I can't believe I wasted so much time in that other mess" to which I said:

"Had you not you wouldn't have attempted writing with your left hand to address the hurt child within who is the true cause of your depression due to immense amounts of emotional repression and suppression since back when". Also, for the record, most practitioners of "mental health" are themselves a huge mess hence why they are best avoided because who but you could be an expert on your inner realms, yes?

 

[lumineth Realm Lord]

I realised that many people seeking professional help in the form of therapy or anti-depressant medication have issues of spiritual rather than material nature. This is in stark contrast to those affected by more tangible neurological degradations or anomalies. How to help them? My intuition tells me "you can't", but I want to know what you say. Can we somehow inspire them to break away from the anxiety and depression? For context, we are considering close relatives & friends, not strangers.

A while ago, I posted a question about the ethics of using magic to help people, and possible consequences if you don't know the full story. I did say that I'm willing to help nuclear family members if I feel the situation is worth it. But anyone else, friends, extended family, neighbors, strangers, not so much.

Let me tell you a short story. I deal with depression and anxiety regarding my autism. I'm essentially a hermit because I'm afraid of bothering or offending people. I go to therapy over it. A former therapist suggested I take some pills. I told her that it won't work. I believe I need knowledge. Not drugs. Two years later of taking those pills, surprise, they don't work.

The point is, I believe that people need to decide for themselves what's in their best interest. Actions have consequences, so how a problem is handled can potentially make things worse. If I were to somehow meddle in someone's life, even with good intentions, I could hurt them. And calling on a force that they've never heard of, or likely would reject, might just do that.

As such, I put emphasis on consent. If I'm gonna interfere and possibly make things worse, I'd rather do so with their permission. Without consent, I look at other factors like my relationship with them, and their religious stance. Sadly, I don't have the right connection, even with extended family, to justify. And a vast majority of my neighbors are really religious. So, whether I'm calling on a Norse god or Goetic spirits, that's like sending a stranger to surprise them with a back massage. So, I make it a general rule to call on God/his angels to help the general public, and experiment on my own behalf. But even that's pushing it.

In highschool, I had an IEP team make my decisions for me. They claimed they were protecting me, but they advertised my disability, thus making me a bigger target for harassment. I essentially al worried about doing the same to others.

I always come to the conclusion that, if you really want to help people, you need to help yourself. Become someone successful enough for them to trust that you know what you're doing. Prop yourself up to get their attention. Forge the right relationship. And then help them. Start small by helping the most immediate family that you can. And work your way outward.

Post automatically merged: Jul 23, 2025

A while ago, I posted a question about the ethics of using magic to help people, and possible consequences if you don't know the full story. I did say that I'm willing to help nuclear family members if I feel the situation is worth it. But anyone else, friends, extended family, neighbors, strangers, not so much.

Let me tell you a short story. I deal with depression and anxiety regarding my autism. I'm essentially a hermit because I'm afraid of bothering or offending people. I go to therapy over it. A former therapist suggested I take some pills. I told her that it won't work. I believe I need knowledge. Not drugs. Two years later of taking those pills, surprise, they don't work.

The point is, I believe that people need to decide for themselves what's in their best interest. Actions have consequences, so how a problem is handled can potentially make things worse. If I were to somehow meddle in someone's life, even with good intentions, I could hurt them. And calling on a force that they've never heard of, or likely would reject, might just do that.

As such, I put emphasis on consent. If I'm gonna interfere and possibly make things worse, I'd rather do so with their permission. Without consent, I look at other factors like my relationship with them, and their religious stance. Sadly, I don't have the right connection, even with extended family, to justify. And a vast majority of my neighbors are really religious. So, whether I'm calling on a Norse god or Goetic spirits, that's like sending a stranger to surprise them with a back massage. So, I make it a general rule to call on God/his angels to help the general public, and experiment on my own behalf. But even that's pushing it.

In highschool, I had an IEP team make my decisions for me. They claimed they were protecting me, but they advertised my disability, thus making me a bigger target for harassment. I essentially al worried about doing the same to others.

I always come to the conclusion that, if you really want to help people, you need to help yourself. Become someone successful enough for them to trust that you know what you're doing. Prop yourself up to get their attention. Forge the right relationship. And then help them. Start small by helping the most immediate family that you can. And work your way outward.

Also, if you work somewhere, practice by doing rites to help the business. You don't necessarily need permission. What impacts the business impacts you. You are always allowed to do what you feel you need to do for yourself. You're also allowed to do rites for whoever is above you for the same reason. But also do what you can to maintain control of the situation. You can't help people if you can't help yourself.

 

[AbammonTheGreat]

I realised that many people seeking professional help in the form of therapy or anti-depressant medication have issues of spiritual rather than material nature. This is in stark contrast to those affected by more tangible neurological degradations or anomalies. How to help them? My intuition tells me "you can't", but I want to know what you say. Can we somehow inspire them to break away from the anxiety and depression? For context, we are considering close relatives & friends, not strangers.

Something I deal with a lot as most of my practice and role in my local community has moved towards this. A few years ago I hit a level of practice and transformation that people in my mundane life took notice that I was different somehow and I found myself in mentorship roles. This directly coincided with a lifestyle choice I made to begin volunteering in behavioral and mental health as a way to help others (for magical reasons as I found that volunteering and community service made my practical magic stronger).

So you can't convince anyone of anything. You may want to help someone and you may know how to help them but unless they ask you you're never going to be able to help them. And even if they do ask you to help them you are going to find a lot of people are not willing to do the work or just aren't ready to let go of their old beliefs and patterns of behavior. So you have to put yourself in situations where you're around the type of people that are ready for help, and then play the waiting game. And even then, you also have to discern who is actually going to help themselves and who is going to take you on a ride and waste your time. I usually give everyone the benefit of the doubt but if they burn me twice I kindly tell them I can't help them and that they can come back to me when they're ready.

You also can't magic/cast spells to instill gnosis, your ideas, or mitigate their suffering, as those are a part of their process of transformation and growth. You are robbing them of the necessary experience to overcome their mental or emotional issues when you do magic to mitigate the consequences of their behaviors, actions, beliefs, and worldviews. What you can do, however, is act as a guide and trigger certain experiences with magic. For example, a woman grieving the death of her fiancee doesn't need a spell to make the grief go away, but needs a regiment of ascetic practice to trigger a spiritual experience within that grief. A drug addict who lost their job and family doesn't need a spell to get their wife back but an experience with diety to instill hope and faith in their recovery. A person with depression doesn't need a magic spell (psychiatric medication) to numb their bad feelings but a ritualized meditation practice of mindfulness and gratitude to help them discover a life worth participating in. What you can offer your clients immediately though is purification, exorcism, warding, or banishment to dispel the entities or "energy" that is keeping them trapped in their unhealthy cycles.

Conducting magic to get somebody to seek spiritual help instead of psychiatric or a therapeutic help is going to backfire every time. And even though I personally subscribe to the same philosophy as you that most mental illness is actually a spiritual issue I can not, as a spiritual counselor and guide, discourage somebody from taking medication prescribed by a doctor. This is how spiritual healers get a bad reputation and so often kill clients or themselves. But if you can show them alternative and supplemental spiritual solutions to their problems then they can grow to a point where they come to the conclusion they don't need the SSRI's anymore. Effective spiritual counseling and healing should in the early stages be coupled with traditional therapy (like CBT, DBT, rehabilitation). Its a multi-pronged approach especially with clients that are suffering immensely.

Now what can you do if you feel this calling to help others but don't have anyone to help? You can do some magic about it. Do a ritual or spell where you offer a commitment or your own "wizardly hippocratic oath" to a diety or spirit to help and heal others with your insight, gnosis, and magical abilities. Then they will place people in your path to help. This is a noble pursuit and one that you will fulfill perfectly as long as you maintain integrity in your commitment to helping and healing. Don't overstep anyone's boundaries and respect their agency.


Gandalf didn't just summon the eagles and take Frodo and Sam straight to Mordor. He knew that the journey was more important than the destination.

 

[SkullTraill]

This advice is a bit generic and may not apply to the kind of help/problem you're specifically talking about, but IMHO: help yourself first. Once you have helped yourself to where you're at a stage that you're comfortable, it will become apparent how you can help others. Often the people who ask "how can I help others" aren't in any position to help others. It's not really a question of knowledge or technique, but of means.

 

[BachausMaximus]

That is great advice. I can't tell you how many times I have heard people say they want to help others while neglecting those who rely on them for support. You can best help others by creating a solid emotional, financial and spiritual foundation for yourself so you have the means and ability to assist others.

These is a saying in search and rescue not to become a casualty. If you attempt to save someone without being prepared yourself, the rescuers often end up with two people to rescue instead of one. The same goes for financial issues.