[Help] New User - How important is keeping a ritual secret?

[lamdaposter]

Hello all,

as my title implies, I am a new user. I am currently in serious relationship with another person, and by nature of this relationship, I tell them about what is happening in my life.

Here is the question I have, with the two of us being bound together in this relationship, and her not telling others about my practices, how much should I obscure from her in order for my practices to succeed?

For example, I need some extra money, and I am taking active magickal measures, and they are working. I am getting extra shifts offered to me left and right by co-workers who would in other circumstances, never ever skip on the opportunity to make some extra money for themselves. Now, I want to move laterally to another position at a different company, which would offer me more pay. Should I tell her about my practices to get this job? Or should I only tell her about my intent to move? (I have already told her about this)

Basically my question is, how much should I let on to other people in my life that I am an active practitioner, and furthermore how much about my practices should I share? Should I even share anything at all to anyone until it is done?

 

[KjEno186]

By telling her, you may involve her desires and feelings as well. She might 'lust for results', and that affects the outcome. You could test this effect on something that's more or less indifferent to the both of you. It would be nice if she's agreeable to participation since two working together are more powerful than just one in isolation. I would hope she understands well enough that you don't want your rituals to become the topic of social media posts. By openly discussing magickal rituals, you open yourself up to reactions from people of very diverse opinions, not all of them supportive.

 

[AbammonTheGreat]

I personally do not follow the old occult axiom of "magic is more powerful if you keep it secret". Secrets and oaths are for pacts with either a spirit, diety, or organization. If you have a responsibility to keep it secret then do that but its not like a birthday candle where if you tell someone you did magic for something it'll break the spell. Obviously this is with caveats, if I am entering court I wouldn't tell the other party "i'm doing a spell to help me win my lawsuit". I wouldn't let someone at a party know that I'm wearing a magic ring to make me seem more attractive or charismatic. I'm not gonna tell someone I'm on a first date with I've got a talisman that helps me get laid. That's just common sense. And then you also need to be careful about what you choose to share with who. I would never tell me Christian mother I did a spell to help her arthritis, I wouldn't tell my muslim friend I conjured a djinn last night, because that would hurt or frighten them, I wouldn't share personal gnosis with a religious person who's worldview would be damaged by said gnosis.

You can share with your partner what you're doing magically. Transparency is important in relationships. The only time I don't share with my wife what I'm doing magically is when it is specifically asked of me by a spirit not to. And if that's the case I tell her "I'm sorry I can't tell you I was requested not to" and she lets it lie. She knows when I do a money spell, if i'm in an initiation, she knows when I do a sex spell, we're in a committed relationship together she needs to know what I'm going through.

 

[lamdaposter]

By telling her, you may involve her desires and feelings as well. She might 'lust for results', and that affects the outcome. You could test this effect on something that's more or less indifferent to the both of you. It would be nice if she's agreeable to participation since two working together are more powerful than just one in isolation. I would hope she understands well enough that you don't want your rituals to become the topic of social media posts. By openly discussing magickal rituals, you open yourself up to reactions from people of very diverse opinions, not all of them supportive.

Thank you for your reply.

For context, so far my standard practice is to tell her of my intent to make more money / move up in my financial pursuits, but to obscure from her the specific means through which I am achieving these results. I know that her intention is for us to be financially successful together, but that she may not believe in occult practices.

So far it has been working, I received a somewhat meaningful promotion, and I am met with no resistance asking for extra hours / taking extra shifts in my professional life. However, I am not sure to what extent this will extend to a new job, as it is effectively a new group of people whose intentions are shielded from me until I interact with them in a meaningful way (e.g. a job interview).

Post automatically merged: Aug 6, 2025

I personally do not follow the old occult axiom of "magic is more powerful if you keep it secret". Secrets and oaths are for pacts with either a spirit, diety, or organization. If you have a responsibility to keep it secret then do that but its not like a birthday candle where if you tell someone you did magic for something it'll break the spell. Obviously this is with caveats, if I am entering court I wouldn't tell the other party "i'm doing a spell to help me win my lawsuit". I wouldn't let someone at a party know that I'm wearing a magic ring to make me seem more attractive or charismatic. I'm not gonna tell someone I'm on a first date with I've got a talisman that helps me get laid. That's just common sense. And then you also need to be careful about what you choose to share with who. I would never tell me Christian mother I did a spell to help her arthritis, I wouldn't tell my muslim friend I conjured a djinn last night, because that would hurt or frighten them, I wouldn't share personal gnosis with a religious person who's worldview would be damaged by said gnosis.

You can share with your partner what you're doing magically. Transparency is important in relationships. The only time I don't share with my wife what I'm doing magically is when it is specifically asked of me by a spirit not to. And if that's the case I tell her "I'm sorry I can't tell you I was requested not to" and she lets it lie. She knows when I do a money spell, if i'm in an initiation, she knows when I do a sex spell, we're in a committed relationship together she needs to know what I'm going through.

Thank you for your insight. She knows I am a practicioner and that I do spells / rituals, but I feel that because she may doubt their effectiveness, it is better to tell her about them after the result is manifest.

 

[therootbeersprite]

Thank you for your insight. She knows I am a practicioner and that I do spells / rituals, but I feel that because she may doubt their effectiveness, it is better to tell her about them after the result is manifest.

How many people are there in the world who believe in our power versus those who doubt? If the doubt of others would alter the effectiveness of the working, then none of us would have any power because we are just so outnumbered. Her doubt doesn't matter unless it makes you doubt. And if you are doubting, then you need to work on your strength of will or else nothing that you do will matter at all. Be open with your partner. Of course, use judgement about who you are open with in general for various social, financial, etc reasons, but don't keep your partner in the dark because she may not share your faith.

 

[FireBorn]

Just a thought here, maybe keep it to yourself until after the result of the working lands. This will do something for you that is huge. It will bolster your own confidence in your own workings. Validation from others is scaffolding for the ego.

Just tell her you are wanting to imrove your life and leave it at that. She doesnt need details does she? Does it truly matter? Do you think she needs those details, or does your ego need to be soothed and stroked by sharing those details with her? Im not asking out of judgment here, just offering a perspective.

If it helps great, if not, burn my words and move on. Good luck!