Occult exhaustion

[ahathoor]

Honestly, I second with great enthusiasm what @Durward have said. Seriousness is a mire that will pull you down, and we live in a time that seems to have once again made seriousness in all its forms into a "moral good". I am struggling with the same things, and have been for a long time.

If you are unfamiliar with it, I can recommend you acquaint yourself with the Principia Discordia, a visionary experience from last century's counterculture revolution in taking fun seriously, and making fun of seriousness... it is probably one of the most powerful texts of abjuration against getting mired in seriousness that I know of.

"Wipe thine ass with What is written
And grin like a ninny at What is spoken"

Also, I'd say feel free to withdraw from any symbols or deities you have been working with closely. This doesn't necessarily mean withdrawing from the Work, more turning it into Play. I have gotten much closer to many forms by withdrawing from them, allowing them to fill up with deep affective meaning again...

Have fun, and enjoy freedom. Stare at the nightsky. Go to a hilltop and trace distant streetlights with your imagination. Get lost in a familiar woods at midnight. Magic is there to give us joy.

 

[querent k]

Totally agree with @ahathoor here. There is also still a bit of Subgenius goofyness to be found on the net. And something that also has been an inspiration for me is that David Tibet (of the band Current 93) worshipped Noddy (a children book character) as a ´´gnostic deity´´ and the comic book author Alan Moore has the roman snake god Glycon as his deity well aware that Glycon was a hoax and ´´a sock puppet´´. Have fun (!!!)

 

[Beyond Everything]

This is largely due to a mental health crisis that took many of my symbols and re-branded them in particularly traumatic ways. I'm rebuilding a sense of self, but it seems to be from a place of feeling like all of the symbols or entities I've collaborated with have lost their vibrancy in my life.

That can, with ingenuity and persistence, transform into a blessing in disguise. The Self is far and away the most important aspect. Symbols and entities are in comparison at most mere satellites to self discovery and development.