Dark Side experiences

[SunnyBlack]

Hello everyone.
I'm new here and am searching for some answers to some of the crazy things I have been experiencing for the last 5-6 years. This is my first time reaching out to anyone or anything regarding this matter. You see I'm a very private person n internalize things a lot hence why I've chosen not to speak out or tell anyone about my personal experiences but it has gotten to the point where I feel like I am losing my free will and am worried I might harm others around me. To give some background to my topic here I will tell you a bit about the experiences I've had and it would be greatly appreciated if any of you out there have had some similar experiences or some bona-fide advice to give on how to control or get rid of the negative aspects of what is inside of me cause I know it is not natural. To put things in the most simple terms, I am not the only one inside of me/my head. After years of this I've come to the point where I know when it's my own thoughts and when it's not my own thoughts that are swirling around in my head. I'm not even sure I should be sharing this info but as I said, I'm concerned about the safety of those around me.

So about a month ago I had one of my many episodes where I was kept awake for a long period of time n each time I would about to fall into sleep my body would twitch almost violently which would cause me to be completely wake till I would start to doze off again all the while thinking if I were to fall asleep that I may never wake up again n at one point I heard a voice separate from my conscience that "you're going to hell" just as I was about to fall asleep. Needless to say, I didn't get any sleep for some few days at which point there were threatening visions in my head which forced me to take a knife and take out my eye which I did but rather than pop my eye which was the intention, I stabbed the area bordering my eye as if my eye was made of a hard glass. The area around my eye was completely swollen n I had cuts all around it n was bleeding blood mixed with tears. I was taken to hospital not long after and on the way there and while waiting to see the doc I was forced to focus my attention on anything else other than my current situation cause I knew somehow that I was being observed, not from outside but from inside if that makes any sense. Like there was an entity inside of my head that shouldn't be there and I wasn't suppose to let it know what I had been doing and thinking about for the previous few days. When I finally seen the doc I was put into a room which resembled a jail cell n they gave me some sedatives which I gladly took n then went to sleep but rather than sleep (or maybe I did manage to fall asleep) I opened my one eye that I could see out of n I caught my arms moving at it's own will as if I was flipping pages from a book while laying down. It takes a lot to scare me these days but I'm at the point where I'm afraid I may hurt someone else without meaning to or even knowing about it as someone I live with heard me walking around while I was actually sleeping just a couple days ago. I think I might be possessed? Something else significant happened to me around the same time I tried to take my eye out immediately after I woke up from sleep one morning as I opened my eyes n was looking up at the ceiling. I'm going to leave that part out so I can see if anyone has had the same experience and can confirm that it is what they say. This is just one of many experiences I have had over the years and I often hear in my head things like "I am the one" or "I am the one true God" which is deffinately not my own thoughts cause I don't think of myself as no God or anything near as such. Other times in the past I managed to convince myself that I was the anti-christ. I would also sometimes hear a dark brooding voice separate from my conscience and clear as someone in the same room as me call out my name but at this point it only bothers me for a couple seconds as I have accepted that there is something else not natural going on inside and around me, I just haven't figured out what it is yet and to be honest am now at the point where I'm getting a bit concerned. As I've stated earlier, this has been going on for quite some time now and it's not just all in my head. My surroundings have been quite strange and "unusual" as well. Visions, predicting the future unintentionally, premonitions, physical sensations on certain parts of my body etc. I know these things aren't natural and was wondering if some of you may have had similar experiences where you can offer some sound advice. Please don't come at me with the "you're probably depressed, medical condition/need medication" stuff. It's not that as I have been admitted to hospital several times from the after effects of these "episodes" if you will and each time they discharge me without any new insight of the cause. If you can relate in any way or have had some experiences that are similar I would be very glad to hear from you n what you have to say. As I've said, this has been going on for some years and I haven't told anyone about these experiences so it might be a good thing for me to have a venue to let all of it out finally n open the flood gates. I am not seeking validation or anything of that sort, just simply some advice and a better understanding of what is happening to me before I do something way out of character and hurt someone. I'm convinced it has something to do with my eye (which eye I will leave out as to leave room for confirmation) as this episode wasn't the first time I had attempted to take my own eye out and I'm surprised that I still have 20/20 vision from both my eyes. My aim is to connect with those who have a real understanding of what is happening or going on around me n then I will get into more detail of the things I have been experiencing and going through as well as the thoughts and theories that I've been carrying around with me. One thing I know for sure is that it is of a dark nature and not natural. -SB

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

Psychiatrists, doctors and therapists are not holding our hand in our dream or waking state, hence thieve no idea what others are going through or where they've been. You're not alone. Give me a bit to digest your post.
After a deliverance I was tormented thoroughly by evil spirits. I knew this because things were unnatural and my discernment picked up on it. Crazy nightmares that mimicked real life and left me waking in a shaken state. Dreams of my choice leading to a failure of Christ and a devil laughing at me. That was an especially traumatizing dream.
No good spiritis would ever force you to hurt yourself - who are you playing with? What led to your occult involvement?

 

[SunnyBlack]

All unintentional. I used to be a drug user but have since cleaned up. I thought at first it was from the after effects of drug withdrawl and convinced myself for awhile that this was the case but I have been off drugs for 3 years now n these experiences and thoughts haven't calmed down or subsided. I haven't entertained these things whatever it is but rather put up with them and I guess have been forced to live with it. It's not really something I want to hold onto as it seems malevolent in nature and I as a person am the opposite. I was never involved in the occult. This would be the closest I've been to being involved with it.

Post automatically merged: Dec 31, 2022

Also I have countless episodes of sleep paralysis. So much so that it's a normal occurrence and only feel scared at the paralyzed stage but as soon as I'm fully awake I just shrug it off, get a glass of water or something to eat then back to bed. There have even been instances where I'm having a bit of fun with it and kinda mocking it in a way which can't be good but maybe a defence mechanism? Just the other night I had a dream where I was seeing myself in spirit form right beside me n everytime I turned my head it would turn as well hence how I knew it was me or my reflection from the side-view. I ended up with sleep paralysis and saying out loud "the joke is on me" a few times before I woke completely. That phrase can take on a dual meaning. Does the term "Duality" mean anything to you? For instance songs that you've heard a hundred times before but then all a sudden it takes on another totally different meaning?

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

Best I can recommend is banishing. I think banishing and meditation upon perhaps a psalm would be helpful to you. Meditate on nothing but a psalm. Banishing can be done in a variety of ways, from scrubbing floors with vinegar like in Hoodoo, getting anointed oil from an Apostolic church, and with the blessed oil draw an equal armed cross (Plus Sign) on each wall, door and window, finally ceiling and floor. Speak Psalms 91 over the cross and give a license to depart for any lingering spirits, then perform an LBRP.

A simpler rout may be to speak and meditate upon Psalms 91 and Psalms 23, and perform an LBRP twice a day.

 

[Roma]

I've come to the point where I know when it's my own thoughts and when it's not my own thoughts

This is a critical skill and allows you to choose more clearly

fall into sleep my body would twitch almost violently which would cause me to be completely wake

This is common when just exiting the body and something causes a rapid re-entry. I used to have that with sleep apnoea. The breathing would stop and I would jump back into the body

a voice separate from my conscience that "you're going to hell"

This looks like a lower mental entity just next to your left ear. Send the entity some heart-light and it will back off

an entity inside of my head that shouldn't be there

If you imagine being outside your body, look at your forehead. Can you imagine eyes in the lower forehead?

caught my arms moving at it's own will as if I was flipping pages from a book while laying down.

When I read that my attention was drawn to a dark entity on the base of your spine. It looks to me like a black octopus

Also looks like a large black octopus on top of your head managing your brain-thoughts. Is that easy to visualize?

countless episodes of sleep paralysis

It looks like a large entity enveloping you.

"nightmare (n.)
c. 1300, "an evil female spirit afflicting men (or horses) in their sleep with a feeling of suffocation"


So you are being oppressed by various entities - and you may have given permission

Permission can occur actively - e.g. invoking a dark entity or deliberately doing wrong things such as staying in a place/relationship/job that you know you should leave.
Permission can be passive - e.g. walking past wrong doing without at least making mental or emotional objection

At some stage you need to forgive yourself and others.

You also need to call in the Light from On High that is the right of all natural humans. The Light descends as a pure white vertical flow into the head and down into the heart where it appears as a Flame.

Here is the Flame exercise. It is fundamental to claiming your spiritual freedom

Meditation & Dream Troubles

Some humans have interference with their head that prevents a proper flow. Interference may be seen as a large black layer/entity on/in the head. In those cases start with however much there is of the Flame in the heart and push heart-light into the darkness on top of the head until there is enough gap for the Light to pass through

 

[DawnMachine]

To have experienced this for 5-6 years is a very long time. I'm new to this forum too but have watched a lot of priests talk about individuals such as yourself. First you should reflect and think about any occult rituals you may have practiced or occult items you may own. All these bad experiences come from giving these entities permission or access to yourself/home. If you have any items do not throw them away just yet (there may be better ways of disposing them). After that you need to consult a Catholic priest— he has to be Catholic and you do not have to be Catholic yourself. Explain to him what you've done that may have led to this, any items you suspect and the rest of your experiences. He'll probably ask you more questions to make sure you're mentally sane and that you shouldn't just be referred to a psychiatrist. If he determines you're compromised he'll probably have to come and bless your home, and do some exorcism prayers. Considering you've been experiencing this for a long time it's possible it will take multiple prayers/visits as from my understanding it is a very judicial process of reading rights of the soul/body etc and making claims. After that you should be good— and be sure to make a donation to the priest for his help. Don't try and fix this yourself— you'll fuck it up; respectfully.

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

All unintentional. I used to be a drug user but have since cleaned up. I thought at first it was from the after effects of drug withdrawl and convinced myself for awhile that this was the case but I have been off drugs for 3 years now n these experiences and thoughts haven't calmed down or subsided. I haven't entertained these things whatever it is but rather put up with them and I guess have been forced to live with it. It's not really something I want to hold onto as it seems malevolent in nature and I as a person am the opposite. I was never involved in the occult. This would be the closest I've been to being involved with it.

Post automatically merged: Dec 31, 2022

Also I have countless episodes of sleep paralysis. So much so that it's a normal occurrence and only feel scared at the paralyzed stage but as soon as I'm fully awake I just shrug it off, get a glass of water or something to eat then back to bed. There have even been instances where I'm having a bit of fun with it and kinda mocking it in a way which can't be good but maybe a defence mechanism? Just the other night I had a dream where I was seeing myself in spirit form right beside me n everytime I turned my head it would turn as well hence how I knew it was me or my reflection from the side-view. I ended up with sleep paralysis and saying out loud "the joke is on me" a few times before I woke completely. That phrase can take on a dual meaning. Does the term "Duality" mean anything to you? For instance songs that you've heard a hundred times before but then all a sudden it takes on another totally different meaning?

Songs used to be my communication with God and the spirits and angels and so on, dearly departed etc.
Then it broke. So, I mustered up my courage to take on Martial Arts. That and the dark side of the occult, as well as playing games like Grand Theft Auto bring out my dark thoughts, similar to when somebody has gone above and beyond in pissing me off. I had a war altar set.
But then beloved Loving-Kindness touched me again. Now it is set for peace and healing.
It seems to men that we work ourselves too thin, especially as users ... and it invites the demonic or infernal to traipse on into us. Partial possession or infestation (things that go bump in the night) often occur. Because we spread ourselves too thin, our inside systems such as the CNS get overloaded, we use up all our body fuel and energy, and go into unconscious trance states, which lower our defenses and subtle body energy further.

This is when you are suddenly numb.

It's a stage before anger - apathy - not caring - before a step before rage.

So, go into a pattern of prayer to forgive others and self, and repeat it endlessly going into trance. Hopefully this will open a door to angels for you. Get a rosary and pray the rosary.
Ancestors can also help, pray to your ancestors for help.
Lastly, pray psalms over yourself, as the book of James instructs us.
Read Phillipians, John, and Luke for inserting truth and understanding of Christ.
Start writing in Biblical Hebrew names of God and archangels and choirs. This will help balance kedusha.

Post automatically merged: Jan 1, 2023

Im trying to locate an online link to a good explanation and instruction on the LBRP. Have you ever heard of or used it?
Whether it is the Star Ruby, Lesser Ritual of the Pentagram, Cross of Light, or the likes, the first thing you need to protect and balance is yourself, the temple first, your immediate dwelling, the inner courtyard second, finally the outer temple or dwelling land.
Several things you can do:
A personal mental and physical banishing ritual with sufficient understanding and usage twice a day.
An energy raising and cultivating ritual once a day.
Prayers on a rosary to induce trance and release unconscious blocks.
Purification of Sacred Space/Inner Courtyard and Temple - Smoke and Water, Rose Cross Ritual, Opening by Watchtower.
Spiritual Transformation by course (such as Christophers Kabbalah, Magic and the Great Work of Self Transformation), or by Ritual (such as in Z.2 Greer/Regardie The Golden Dawn 7th Ed.).

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Post automatically merged: Jan 1, 2023

This is a critical skill and allows you to choose more clearly



This is common when just exiting the body and something causes a rapid re-entry. I used to have that with sleep apnoea. The breathing would stop and I would jump back into the body



This looks like a lower mental entity just next to your left ear. Send the entity some heart-light and it will back off



If you imagine being outside your body, look at your forehead. Can you imagine eyes in the lower forehead?



When I read that my attention was drawn to a dark entity on the base of your spine. It looks to me like a black octopus

Also looks like a large black octopus on top of your head managing your brain-thoughts. Is that easy to visualize?



It looks like a large entity enveloping you.

"nightmare (n.)
c. 1300, "an evil female spirit afflicting men (or horses) in their sleep with a feeling of suffocation"


So you are being oppressed by various entities - and you may have given permission

Permission can occur actively - e.g. invoking a dark entity or deliberately doing wrong things such as staying in a place/relationship/job that you know you should leave.
Permission can be passive - e.g. walking past wrong doing without at least making mental or emotional objection

At some stage you need to forgive yourself and others.

You also need to call in the Light from On High that is the right of all natural humans. The Light descends as a pure white vertical flow into the head and down into the heart where it appears as a Flame.

Here is the Flame exercise. It is fundamental to claiming your spiritual freedom

Meditation & Dream Troubles

Some humans have interference with their head that prevents a proper flow. Interference may be seen as a large black layer/entity on/in the head. In those cases start with however much there is of the Flame in the heart and push heart-light into the darkness on top of the head until there is enough gap for the Light to pass through

I agree.
Obtain a couple of white tealight candles, an incense stick holder and incense, preferably Sandalwood, and or Frankincense and or Mhyrr.
Relax and clear your mind.
Light one of the two candles, preferably the left.
Say:
"I light this candle in devotion to the Ha-Shem and ask the light of his Son and his Spirit and his angels fill my room."
Light the incense.
Say:
"I light this fragrance in devotion to you and ask for a thorough spiritual cleansing of my temple, inner courtyard, and outer courtyard and all high places and strongholds (permissions) revoked in the name of the Son of God, Jesus Christ and by the power of the Holy Spirit and his angels."
Light the second candle and say:
I call on all organizations of light, be they The Society of Light, Fraternity of the Hidden Light, Builders of the Adytum, Fraternity of the Ibis, The O.S.S., The O.T.O., the A.A., The Golden Dawn, S.R.I.A., The Rosicrucians, Knights Templar, and all clergy of the Church draw up and turn back all forces of evil and purify my temple and inner courtyard.
So be it, it is done, Selah, Amen.
Allow them to burn out. Always keep fire safety in mind.
Record experiences in a journal starting with the date time and present feelings and thoughts. Record a journal here as well. This will help an Adept or Magus guide you out of your abyss, such as @Roma or @OwnChef.