One of my very close relative died almost two weeks ago. The funeral happened today. I wanted to see him before they close the coffin and bury, in spite that I know, this is nothing more but a body, which have no use for anyone else, and meant to be given back to Mother Nature, while the soul is preparing to start a new journey.
We was on our way to step closer. My grandmother asked:
- Are you sure you want to see him? -she whispered.
- Yes - I whispered back.
-
You dare to take a look at him?
-
Granny, don't worry about me. I've got used to the sight, and I've seen worst before.
But when we got there, my brother stopped 3 methers away from the coffin. Now I know why, as he later explained: he was shocked.
What we had to face was our deceased relative, who's jaw actually dropped down and fell inside, totally. It was indeed, shocking sight. Not because I've never seen graphic images and videos of dead bodies and am sensitive. No, I've seen very brutal ones but none of them traumatized me. Probably because for me, the deceased persons meant nothing; they were just bodies to me, which got left behind by their previous owner, the soul, and because I had no memories connected to them, it was easier to observe and keep myself emotionally away from the "expired shell".
But when I saw my beloved one's body like that, despite that I knew that his true being have nothing to do with it anymore, it traumatized me, to the point that I still can't help but keep seeing the blinking image of his face in my mind. I stared at his body, for centimeters away from him, his face, trying to find familiar lines, shapes, parts, but it was nearly impossible. Only his closed eyes had some familiar tones, nothing else. I tried to remind myself every knowledge I have, but the sight was rough.
Here in my country we have a saying: "
His chin got tied up." / "
Felkötötték az állát." Which means, that the person has died.
Normally, tying up the chin is a process what they do after death, because of the cadaveric state and the way how the body stop "working". The jaw drops when the muscles not holding it anymore. This is why it have to be tied up, otherwise when the body becames stiff, they can not help this anymore. His body was found 1-2 days after his death, in his bed, so it was already too late to tie his chin up, and I totally forgot about this.
I've seen the dead photos of my dad -
he passed away at age 25 so I was only 2 years old at this time -, I've seen two funeral of other beloved ones, but this one was not only sad but also shocking. I've already accepted what happened, and I also did my best to give his soul the best support, so I called and asked Archangel Azrael to lead and guard his soul, support him and also asked help from my own soul; we was there for him, and I felt the presence his soul as well. I felt that his soul was grateful, and free.
I've already got an amazing book from my mother to read and study, because we had a small chat about this after the funeral. It's about death and the soul's path and the process it have to go through before a new incarnation. It's written by his great master, Sri Aurobindo. The topic isn't new to me, and I have knowledge about this, but I think that this experience of today's, pushes me to spend some proper time with this topic, and approach this on a new level, and so maybe I can handle my emotions, with simply focusing on the process itself, and the soul themselves.