Journal Journal of Night and Day, Son and Moon

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

Will concentrate on
1. Other scheduled tasks
2. Personal laundry
3. Paper reduction
4. Novena rituals / planning
5. Reading for day

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

1. Was not done today, will attempt to complete the other four.

E Lord of the Universe. Neophyte signs.
S LRVH Afternoon adoration.
W LRVH Evening adoration.
W Lord of the Universe. Neophyte signs.
N Neophyte signs.

Neophyte Formula for evening not done yet. Not due til 8.

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

Today and the supposed new job was thwarted due to third parties. Likewise food for the week.

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

Apparently man is meant to live to work for nothing is the moral of the story for me.

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

Well, today was a clusterfuck in some ways, yet hope remains.
Self education is a must.
No food pantry.
Hangup on first job offer due to background check.
Nothing else accomplished yet.
Roommate on my case about a job and past rent.

My only visible solution is armed robbery. Anyone else have a solution?

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

This past winter, I had reached out to Bime for help in finding a job.
I found one after a grueling walk in severe weather on outskirts of town.
McDonalds was found ... By Spring I was out of there.
However, I had also done a Novena ritual for a job.
Looking back at it. I also have a week of Novenas written down by day. Will try on day and hour of day, with appropriate LRP done before to invoke energy. MP to likewise build energy. Then release when done by banishing.

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

One door closed, another opened.
The job would be relatively simple, and easy to get to.

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

Interview in four hours, which means I have roughly three hours to enjoy my coffee. Time for a smoke as well.

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

E Neophyte signs
E Morning Lord of the Universe
E Morning LRVH, Theoricus sign, sign of silence.
S Neophyte signs
W Neophyte signs
W Lord of the Universe
N Neophyte signs
E Qaballistic Cross
E, S, W, N Invoking Spirit LRP
E Qaballistic Cross

Adorations performed with arm length knobby straight wand.
QC LRP QC with dagger.

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

I now have a pair of feathers, what is what I expect to be a growing collection.
One a pidgeon feather I believe. Found at work.
A brown and grey striped feather (hawk?) Found near apartment.
Goal: find more. Use in ritual. Adorn wand with feathers?

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

Goal for the week: Be brave and courageous, be authentic in dealings with self and others.

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

Putting others out of work is a slippery slope to their life.
Not everybody is the same.
Not everyone wants the same things in life.

Point:
I have zero self esteem or self worth.
I go through the motions daily.
I am fearful for the future in different ways.
I have zero confidence in God.
The cawing of crows is what I've become used to, that and waiting for the end of this all.
There is no dream job, due to self-esteem and self worth. Disbelief in myself. Why should I?

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

General reading on the job for me.
Split Hexagram Spread

Greater Spiritual Influence - V Hierophant
Lesser Spiritual Influence - VI Lovers
Spiritual Advice - XI Justice
Unconscious Desires - XIX The Sun
Conscious Desires - I Magician
Practical Advice - IX Hermit
Final Outcome - XX Judgement

How the hell do I interpret this into a model such as the USA Federal GS pay scale and occupational classes?

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

Taurus, that which fastens things together. Vav. Nail. 6.
Gemini. That which can cleave a thing even in word. Sword. 7.
Libra. Action-Work-Equilibrium. That which steers or instructs or punishes. Ox goad or whip. 30.
Sol. Head that is not a head. Regeneration. 200.
Mercury. Focused concentration. House. 2.
Virgo. Law of Response. Yod. Hand. 10.
Fire. That which tears apart. Tooth. Shin. 300.
Total -- 555.

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

Card for the day: XVII The Star.
Tzaddi. 90. Hope. Meditation.
Nature unveils itself.

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

Kitchen work it seems to me to be.
Will work on self esteem and self worth.
Maybe I can raise it back to a national of global average within the year.

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

Taurus, that which fastens things together. Vav. Nail. 6.
Gemini. That which can cleave a thing even in word. Sword. 7.
Libra. Action-Work-Equilibrium. That which steers or instructs or punishes. Ox goad or whip. 30.
Sol. Head that is not a head. Regeneration. 200.
Mercury. Focused concentration. House. 2.
Virgo. Law of Response. Yod. Hand. 10.
Fire. That which tears apart. Tooth. Shin. 300.
Total -- 555.

"This one" and "shaver" in Hebrew to English. Cat or dog groomer?

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

Really really really close to be an atheist.
Nothing in life should be this difficult.
And all this trouble for someone's bruised ego?
Screw your ego, I damn it to hell.

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

Well. Well. Gotta watch my temper and disbelief. I now have a job.

 

[Diluculo_DelFuego]

Perhaps a reason for my anger bout is the usual .. get persnickety when things aren't going my way.
On the other hand, I've seen CEO salaries when I wasn't supposed to, and while it was a great wage, for six months on contract, reduce rate by half for am annual salary was not that great to me.
And now I make half of that.