Journal Journal of Night and Day, Son and Moon

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Tried being civil to them in every encounter, especially at the beginning. Tried being quiet. Tried to ignore it.
Others moved shortly after the problems began. Others disturbed by their behavior.
If I had the resources, I would have moved last year.

In regard to the Hierophant, mediation and relaying the divine word has been religion in the past.

 

[Lemongrass00]

Tried being civil to them in every encounter, especially at the beginning. Tried being quiet. Tried to ignore it.
Others moved shortly after the problems began. Others disturbed by their behavior.
If I had the resources, I would have moved last year.

In regard to the Hierophant, mediation and relaying the divine word has been religion in the past.

I meant moreso on meditation

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Ah, meditating is still a problem for me getting my mind to be quiet. I used to meditate for up to five minutes, and visualization was fine.
Now visualization is obscured, and its hard to meditate on a point, a line, a cube, a series of chakra colors.

 

[Lemongrass00]

Ah, meditating is still a problem for me getting my mind to be quiet.

I have struggled with this issue early on, maybe a simple change of perspective can help you.

Instead of forcibly "quieting" your mind, you should act as an observer who observes your impulsive thoughts as they come and acknowledge them, WITHOUT engaging in them or else it will turn into daydreaming.

Eventually your mind and ego will quiet and stop barking about its impulsive wants and needs and like a glass of water full of sand, the sand will eventually fall to the bottom and stillen, allowing you to see clearly through the water.

It takes time but do not expect too much of yourself.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Awesome advice, thank you very much

==============================================================================================================

This morning when I got up, I did Lord of the Universe Adoration, Solar Adoration, and LBRP.

The ups and downs of life. Heard a bunch of threats and loudness from the neighbors. Im moving out of here asap. If I have to beg my parents for help with move in costs and have a job, I should do okay. Both recent jobs took a pass on me. So off to find a job today. And hit food pantry.

Im so sick of this, life should not be this oppressive. I even prayed to Christ for help. We shall see how that goes.

Been searching for jobs and housing and trying to file my list years return to no avail as of yet. I may just do a paper form instead.

Went to food pantry, got three sweet potatoes, a handful of navel oranges, and two grapefruit; as well as a box of Mac n cheese and some canned fruits and veggies. Got home okay before it started raining. Texted a couple friends today on housing. Applied for some jobs.
I may just have to go and fill out paper applications, though with indeed, I fail to see the point.

Aside from applying for jobs and trying to prepare to move, Im going to meditate and try doing Qi Gong exercises.

I recall nearly a year ago trying to call on demons, I have no idea why other than desperation. Whats been proven to me is nothing beside God and I.
I was looking for a lotto ticket and good times I guess. Well, Solomon and the Byrds wrote a poem and a song.

Napped a bit and not feeling well, my browser locked up again for no reason, just like the taxes. Im really not feeling life and was contemplating how I could take myself out of it. But that doesn't solve anything, right?

So, I guess I practice meditation, the Zelator formula, and mind my studies. Been reading Blamire for a bit. Heavy history lecture on my next post.
Laid down to meditate and fell asleep. Neighbors still up to their antics. Reached out to one room for rent which seems ideal for me.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Before falling asleep, tried meditation as a passive observer. I felt the thought of guided meditation and had a flashback to a Martial Art class where we did that, and it was a walk through the forest. I observed it and eventually my mind was less hasty and less noisy.

Did full round of Liber Resh Vel Helios adorations starting in the East after an Adoration to the Lord of the Universe. Followed that with the Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram. I did not do the Middle Pillar, since I am about to retire.

I guess quitting is a strong part of my nature. While not ideal environments for me were I to have a seizure, it floors me how many jobs Ive let go that were not involved with heights at all, and it shows me I am still burning bridges every year.

If I were to do so with magic and education, I would have and be, to myself, nothing. These are all Ive been interested in. Not a hunter, sportsman, outdoorsman, etc that Boy Scouts tried to promote. Instead I was a bookworm, curious, a daydreamer, and a peaceable happy person.

It took the Qlippoth snd this world to flip my nature in reverse.


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Thursday 4/30/2023. 08:33. Jupiter day. Royal Blue.
Planetary hour as of 08:33 -- Mars. Current Planetary Hour -- Venus. Meeting/conversing with friend -- Sol hour.

Sleep: Slept most of day yesterday and looked healthier, distressed and regenerated. Then the neighbors crap talk was overheard and caused stress.

Dreams: None recalled, except for snakes on the floor and being some sort of journalist.

Mood: Fair

Weather: Cold, sunny, clouds in the blue sky.

Moon Phase: 64.3% Waxing Gibbous in 26.01 Cancer. Full Moon Apr 6.

Current Transits:

Sun

9°37’ Ari
Moon 26°01’ Can

First Quarter Moon (106°24’)

Mercury

22°42’ Ari
Venus 16°21’ Tau
Mars 2°30’ Can

Jupiter

18°47’ Ari
Saturn 2°34’ Pis
Uranus 16°43’ Tau
Neptune 25°40’ Pis
Pluto 0°07’ Aqu
Node (M) 5°30’ Tau R
Node (T) 4°19’ Tau R
Lilith (M) 9°04’ Leo

Chiron

15°29’ Ari

Physical/Mental Notes:
Up and at em, going to do Neophyte Formula shortly, do some moving rearrangements, and hopefully see my sister today.
Will find a job today and get back on my horse.
I need to get out of this ghetto and find a place less ghetto at the least. I have taken steps toward this goal.
For starters, it might do me good to work in nature through the coming months, or perhaps at a plant nursery. Get my druid on.


Reading Secret Wisdom of all Ages, Magic of the Celtic Otherworld, and Israel Regardie and the Philosophers Stone today.
Past that, Wed, The, Fri educational resources. Try to tie them into one cohesive idea or theory will be the aim.


Walking back from Speedway, met one of the four people I respect in this vast multi apartment complex ghetto, and he and I walked and talked about many theories including Atlantis and the Celts of course. He is into Buckland style Witchcraft, and Celtic Magic. We discussed the Celts and the Norse. He also dropped the Law of Attraction and Positive Thinking (Norman Vincent Peale) on me.

Rituals:
Morning Neophyte Formula done.
Morning Adoration/.Solar Adorations (LRVH with grade signs) done.
Candle rituals this week will involve repelling bad circumstances and drawing good circumstances.

Tarot:
Card of the Day: 0 The Fool (Thoth deck). Elemental Air. Kether to Chokmah, 11th Path.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Friday, Mar 31 2023 -- Venus. Green.
Sleep: slept on couch/loveseat, tossed and turned
Dreams: a few, no detail recalled.
Current Transits: will update later
Moon Phase : will update later. Last known was waxing gibbous in Cancer or Leo.
Weather: Rainy, 40s to 50s
Mood: High
Physical notes: Dyskinesia and shower anxiety playing a large part these days.
Mental Notes:
Spent day and night with family, played partners with the game Sequence which was fun and suspenseful. Won a few games.
Reading Magic of the Celtic Otherworld and Secret Wisdom of all Ages for any detail out of mainstream history on the Celts. Working on theory of Atlantis involvement.
Will be going back home tomorrow, and will start carting bags of clothes down to the entryway for others to take.
Going the path of the Hermit, going to move on with little in tow. Books, clothes, laptop, staves and wand and such, ritual supplies.
Rituals: None as in anther household.
Tarot:. See above.

Post automatically merged: Mar 31, 2023

About to start note taking for book review on Magic of the Celtic Otherworld. A first for me despite fair anthropology grades in the past.
It's the only history I can get into.

Post automatically merged: Mar 31, 2023

Did Rosary per the Ganesha post .. ramping up on studies.

Post automatically merged: Mar 31, 2023

May see about an MRI or CAT Scan. Particularly for Parkinson's or Huntington Chorea.

Studies today: C Programming, Statistics, Astronomy.

Post automatically merged: Mar 31, 2023

May see about an MRI or CAT Scan. Particularly for Parkinson's or Huntington Chorea.

Studies today: C Programming, Statistics, Astronomy.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

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Saturday.. April 1, 2023. Saturn. Indigo-Black.
Sleep: Four hours tops.
Dreams: two dreams, no recall.
Mental Notes: Frazzled .. a lot on my mind. Discussed fears and dreams with my family.

That's all for now.


No magic being done over the weekend.
May start pathworkings as an alternative.
Have a programming idea, with combo of astronomy and statistics -- Mars expelled a large particle that carried Mars DNA which created life. Could measure growth of plant spagyrics.
To prove it I write a program.[

At home temporarily, so doing Neophyte Formula.
Card of the Day (Thoth):
Knight of Swords. Chokmah of Yetzirah.
Fire of Air. X of EXARP. Violent part of wind and storm applied to a manageble element.


Tried doing point meditation last night before bed which grew leaves and blossomed into a flower, a lotus or rose I thought. Tried to gently lure my attention back to the point and saw a vague dot so I associated that with the symbol of Sol which turned into a sun. 5 minutes.

Spent day with my sister and checked in on my cat and snuggled with her. Will be going back home tomorrow.

About to go to bed after two days reading and writing out the timeline for the Book Club Journal on Magic of the Celtic Otherworld. Will update all my posts and go over the replies, especially on Greer's Druid Group and the Lodge advice given.

Will work on my fears this week, and try to video myself doing rituals this week as well. With rubber legs syndrome as of late (possible dyskinesia), will also be doing deck squats, one legged dead drop and burpees as leg strengthening.
Will try visualization work/pathworkings before bed.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

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Sunday, April 2, 2023 (4+2+7=13=1+3=4, Order). Sol. Yellow-Gold.

Sleep: Did not sleep well last couple nights due to anxieties.

Dreams: Have had several but by waking time the detil is largely gone, cannot even remember the dreamscape.

Current Transits:

Sun

12°56’ Ari

Moon

6°02’ Vir

Waxing Gibbous (143°06’)

Mercury

28°46’ Ari
Venus 20°19’ Tau
Mars 4°10’ Can

Jupiter

19°35’ Ari
Saturn 2°55’ Pis
Uranus 16°53’ Tau
Neptune 25°47’ Pis
Pluto 0°09’ Aqu
Node (M) 5°20’ Tau R
Node (T) 4°09’ Tau R
Lilith (M) 9°27’ Leo

Chiron

15°41’ Ari


Moon Phase:

Moon: 89.9%

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Weather:
47 °F

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Precipitation: 20%
Humidity: 65%
Wind: 12 mph

Mood: Fair

Physical Notes:
Had an anxiety attack in Barnes and Noble. Back home now, and time for me to do Zelator Formula shortly.

Mental Notes:
A bit overwhelmed, but had a couple divine encounters today. Wont go into detail as you'd have to be there. But good news on a couple fronts. Now to find a job suitable for an anxious epileptic. A desk job in a quiet environment, perhaps a junior programmer. Cannot do data center work any longer, nothing with heights, no mall type employment. Has to be a library perhaps.

Tarot Card of the Day: XIII Death (Thoth deck). Change/Transformation. Netzach-Tiphareth. 24th Path of the Sepher Yetzirah.

Rituals:
No Neophyte Formula this morning.
Doing Zelator Formula shortly.

Meditations: Will attempt another shot at a path working and meditation on Point-Line-Cube.


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Monday -- 4/3/2023 (7+7=14=5, Mediation). Luna. Silver/Gray

Sleep: Slept well. Awoke at 4am.

Dreams: None recalled.


Current Transits:



Moon Phase:


Weather:


Mood: Fair

Physical Notes:


Mental Notes:
A bit overwhelmed, but had a couple divine encounters today. Wont go into detail as you'd have to be there. But good news on a couple fronts. Now to find a job suitable for an anxious epileptic. A desk job in a quiet environment, perhaps a junior programmer. Cannot do data center work any longer, nothing with heights, no mall type employment. Has to be a library perhaps.

Tarot Card of the Day: Ace of Disks. Spirit of Earth. N[1] of NANTA. Root of the Powers of Earth. Kether of Malkuth in Assiah.

Rituals:
Neophyte Formula this morning.
Doing Zelator Formula in evening.

Meditations: Will attempt another shot at a path working and meditation on Point-Line-Cube.


Reading for Day - Manly Hall's Secret Wisdom of All Ages, Organic Chemistry with Biological Applications, Israel Regardie and the Philosophers Stone, Golden Dawn: Alchemy docs. Magic of the Celtic Otherworld, Chapter two.

Post automatically merged: Apr 3, 2023

It's been a day - almost died. Encountered a few kids that shouted at me amidst already deafening intersection noise, and flashed gang signs, so by the time I'm on the bus I have a panic attack, barely get to my apartment building and have a triple grand Mal seizure. Fighting to stay conscious, hyperventilating, trying not to pass away.
Ambulance arrives, Im at the hospital, they pump me full of medication and send me on my way. Get to downtown, go into Starbucks to relieve myself and get a turkey and pesto cheese sandwich (which I shared a bit with my kitty, finally home thank you sweet Jesus.
No work will be done tonight.

Post automatically merged: Apr 3, 2023

The night is still young however, so might as well pick up on the studies. Overslept this morning due to sleep interruptions, had gone down to get an 1/8 prepackaged pot, and got a free runts pre-roll, smoked a third of a bowl with coffee, then went to catch the bus home when all the later festivities occurred. I could swear I saw a demon on the clouds, and when crying out to Christ, heard a crow caw once and depart, and birds singing.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

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Monday -- 4/3/2023 (7+7=14=5, Mediation). Luna. Silver/Gray


Sleep: Slept well. Awoke at 4am.

Dreams: None recalled.

Current Transits:

Sun

13°55’ Ari
Moon 18°09’ Vir

Waxing Gibbous (154°14’)
Mercury 0°26’ Tau
Venus 21°29’ Tau
Mars 4°41’ Can

Jupiter

19°49’ Ari
Saturn 3°01’ Pis
Uranus 16°56’ Tau
Neptune 25°49’ Pis
Pluto 0°10’ Aqu
Node (M) 5°16’ Tau R
Node (T) 4°06’ Tau R
Lilith (M) 9°34’ Leo

Chiron

15°44’ Ari

Moon Phase: Moon (Luna, Levanah, Yesod) is 95% Waxing Gibbous in 154.14 Virgo

Weather: Partly rainy, 50's

Mood: Fair

Physical Notes: Lightheadedness followed by intimidation followed by a anxiety spell leading to a panic attack on the way home on the bus, all triggered by noise, cars patterns, and the occasional charmer.


Mental Notes:
A bit overwhelmed, but had a couple divine encounters today. Wont go into detail as you'd have to be there. But good news on a couple fronts. Now to find a job suitable for an anxious epileptic. A desk job in a quiet environment, perhaps a junior programmer. Cannot do data center work any longer, nothing with heights, no mall type employment. Has to be a library perhaps.

Tarot Card of the Day: Ace of Disks. Spirit of Earth. N[1] of NANTA. Root of the Powers of Earth. Kether of Malkuth in Assiah.

Rituals:
Neophyte Formula this morning.
Doing Zelator Formula in evening.

Meditations: Will attempt another shot at a path working and meditation on Point-Line-Cube.


Reading for Day - Manly Hall's Secret Wisdom of All Ages, Organic Chemistry with Biological Applications, Israel Regardie and the Philosophers Stone, Golden Dawn: Alchemy docs. Magic of the Celtic Otherworld, Chapter two.

Post automatically merged: Apr 3, 2023

It's been a day - almost died. Encountered a few kids that shouted at me amidst already deafening intersection noise, and flashed gang signs, so by the time I'm on the bus I have a panic attack, barely get to my apartment building and have a triple grand Mal seizure. Fighting to stay conscious, hyperventilating, trying not to pass away.
Ambulance arrives, Im at the hospital, they pump me full of medication and send me on my way. Get to downtown, go into Starbucks to relieve myself and get a turkey and pesto cheese sandwich (which I shared a bit with my kitty, finally home thank you sweet Jesus.



No work will be done tonight.




The night is still young however, so might as well pick up on the studies. Overslept this morning due to sleep interruptions, had gone down to get an 1/8 prepackaged pot, and got a free runts pre-roll, smoked a third of a bowl with coffee, then went to catch the bus home when all the later festivities occurred. I could swear I saw a demon on the clouds, and when crying out to Christ, heard a crow caw once and depart, and birds singing.

Think I will spend my time reading Occult Chemistry as a side lecture -- as well as a review of healing angels and some on Chrisian Rosekreutz. In addition to reading Organic Chem with Bio applications and Israel Regardie and the Philosophers Stone.

Found myself hugging a few trees today and walking in post rain weather out of the hospital. This morning was beautiful while I was seizing out even. Found myself preferring to walk on grass today and to lie down into the earth and find it comforting.

Might I add SpaceMan's Rainbow Sherbet a nice skunk.


Hail #4. Help to emerge out from under spiritual torment. Hail the Almighty Christ as well. Venus hour awoke, Venus hour arrived home, protected by Mars and Sol against Saturn. My take on it.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Tuesday 4-4-2023 (15=6, Beauty)
A friend caught me. I will have shelter, storage and laundry .. and friends. She bought me dinner, is letting me couch crash tonight, helped me haul a bunch of clothes over to her place, a place of security. The path of the Hermit? The Hierophant was my card of the day.

 

[stalkinghyena]

The Hierophant was my card of the day.

My take? You really should just start calling yourself an Adept because Neophyte Zelators don't get fucked with like you do or find themselves wrestling with angels of Providence.
Like the old Frog said, "Travail, Realization, Adaptation." Sounds right to me.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

My take? You really should just start calling yourself an Adept because Neophyte Zelators don't get fucked with like you do or find themselves wrestling with angels of Providence.
Like the old Frog said, "Travail, Realization, Adaptation." Sounds right to me.

Well...I appreciate it, but since I've littlenclue what I'm doing and suck at geomancy, astrology, and tarot readings, and have no knowledge of my HGA, and no thought control, pretty far from an Adept. My take. An Adept would know what to have on their altar for example. Plus battling a basilisk on geburah would be my next task as an Adept.

Post automatically merged: Apr 5, 2023

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Wednesday, 4-5-2023 (7). Mercury. Orange
Sleep - slept well
Dreams - none recalled
Current Transits -
Sun Aries 15°27’ Ari
Moon Libra 7°31’ Lib
Waxing Gibbous (172°04’)
Mercury Taurus 2°56’ Tau
Venus Taurus 23°20’ Tau
Mars Cancer 5°28’ Can
Jupiter Aries 20°12’ Ari
Saturn Pisces 3°11’ Pis
Uranus Taurus 17°01’ Tau
Neptune Pisces 25°53’ Pis
Pluto Aquarius 0°11’ Aqu
Node (M) Taurus 5°11’ Tau R
True Node (T)Taurus 4°02 ’Tau R
Lilith (M) Leo 9°44’ Leo
Chiron Aries 15°50’ Ari
Moon Phase - Waxing Gibbous 7.30 Libra
Weather - sunny, cold
Anxiety - High
Mood - Fair
Mental Notes - imploding feeling yet know all will be okay.
Physical Notes - shaky legs, headache from seizures.
Rituals:
Did in East Adoration to the Lord of the Universe
Ten point TA adorations
Liber Resh Vel Helios adorations
Qaballistic Cross Ritual
Lesser Ritual of the Pentagram, Earth banishing
Sacred Chamber

Post automatically merged: Apr 6, 2023

Got up with the sun and did the Neophyte Formula.
Had breakfast with my lady friend.
Helped my lady friend move and bag a bunch of junk her kids had stored outside. A lot of bags.
Donated a couple bikes to a neighbor.
Got a change of clothes and went shopping with her, even started to go into Nordstroms, but my spectrum took in too much input so went back outside and waited for her while she shopped.
Went in grocery shopping in an organic store.
Went back home and checked on Pandie.
Got picked up by my sister and went to folks place.
Went out to Red Lobster for dinner.
Went into Walmart, which was huge for tackling my store anxiety.
Got a new phone.
Now retiring for the night.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

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Thursday - 4-6-2023 (8 Reciprocation)
Jupiter Day .. Royal Blue.
Sleep - Rough. About four hours solid sleep.
Dreams - None recalled .
Current Transits -
Moon Phase -
Weather - Sunny
Anxiety - High
Mood - Fair
Mental Notes - A day today ... C Programming day to be precise. One day closer to the new job, while not putting all my eggs in one basket.
Physical Notes -
Rituals - None performed while away from my place.
Tarot Card of the Day -
Meditations - Visualization/Meditation

 

[stalkinghyena]

Plus battling a basilisk on geburah would be my next task as an Adept.

They taste like chicken. A little rubbery. You can make boots with their skin.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

I could call myself an Adept, but I feel that's a premature decision.
On the other hand, I could memorize Opening by Watchtower, and do every initiation ritual by memorization, in speaking every word and doing all gestures.
Still, why? I want to be become an Adept.
Not just call myself one, or become one via spirits.
Maybe I will do all of the above.

Post automatically merged: Apr 6, 2023

Finally got a four hour nap. Had lunch.
Watched Nat Geo on pyramid excavations. Had dinner. Will try to meditate tonight and perhaps do a pathworking.

Post automatically merged: Apr 6, 2023

Watching Nat Geo ... Safe to say with everything that's gone on, no work was done this week. Most likely the month since everything has to be a gigantic pain in the ass.

 

[stalkinghyena]

I could call myself an Adept, but I feel that's a premature decision.

The fact that you are cautiously humble about it makes you an Adept.
The fact that you even know about the Opening by Watchtower makes you an Adept.
The fact that you say:

Will try to meditate tonight and perhaps do a pathworking.

Makes you as powerful as Crowley. If you don't believe me read Magick Without Tears. If you find yourself anticipating everything he is saying, you might be a higher grade. Just don't make a big thing out of it.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

The fact that you are cautiously humble about it makes you an Adept.
The fact that you even know about the Opening by Watchtower makes you an Adept.
The fact that you say:

Makes you as powerful as Crowley. If you don't believe me read Magick Without Tears. If you find yourself anticipating everything he is saying, you might be a higher grade. Just don't make a big thing out of it.

Right on
Will check out Magick without Tears for sure.

According to my education plan,
Today is Statistics/Spirit Communications day. Tomorrow is Astronomy/Shemhamphoresh Day.
The proof of reading will be a simple program describing the material.

Friday, Venus day. Emerald Green.
Sleep: Fair
Dreams: some but no dream recall.
Current Transits:

Sun

17°22’ Ari

Moon

2°36’ Sco

Full Moon (195°13’)
Mercury 5°48’ Tau
Venus 25°38’ Tau
Mars 6°28’ Can

Jupiter

20°40’ Ari
Saturn 3°22’ Pis
Uranus 17°07’ Tau
Neptune 25°57’ Pis
Pluto 0°13’ Aqu
Node (M) 5°05’ Tau R
Node (T) 4°00’ Tau st
Lilith (M) 9°57’ Leo

Chiron

15°57’ Ari
Moon Phase: Waning Gibbous in Scorpio, perfect for baneful magic.
Weather: 30 deg F. High 50s, windy.
Anxiety: High
Mood: Fair
Mental Notes:
Physical Notes:
Rituals: None til home, Zrlator Formula when home.
Tarot: Card of the day - IX The Hermit. Yod, 10, hand. 20th path of Sepher Yetzirah.

Post automatically merged: Apr 7, 2023

Statistics with Julia, Tutors Quick Guide to Statistics, Statistics in a Nutshell, and Mathematics and Statistics in Biology.
The reading for the day academically; Kaballah. magic and the Great Work of Self Transformation and Book of Spirit Communications non academic readi g for the day.
Tomorrow is Astronomy and Shem day.
Zelator Formula to be done once home.

Post automatically merged: Apr 7, 2023

My Dad got winded vacuuming his room, and I vacuumed the living room while he took a seat at the table, and was still winded to the point where his asthma flared up, or COPD or just getting winded (the man has only one lung). His heart stopped and he fainted, falling almost face down on the table until I caught him while his girlfriend called 911. They showed up, bloodworm was normal, and they decided to keep him for at least 24 hours to monitor. Felt horrible since I cannot drive and dont have a car or money or a place close to them. She will be down in NC for a couple days visiting family (they were going to drive down there originally) by flying out there to cut down on time away from him. They have Life Alert, so not too concerned. But Im a tired camper still after my recent epieptic seizures and hyperventilating during them. So peace out, going to bed soon.

Post automatically merged: Apr 7, 2023

Rituals and Prayers of Healing after drawing in enough energy to expend. I am nowhere near ready to move. If anything I have to choose what I cannot do without. Going to do a lot....let's put it this way, my wand has to be put to as much labor as Ive gone through in my life, p[repare the staff and blasting rod, consecrate and guard their secrecy with my life.
Reading the Siddur, thinking of with the wand tracing letter by letter of every word which must be spoke, and all the gestures it must endure, and by use is consecration; and reading the Siddur, I clearly see Yod Heh Vav Heh right to left - which means Yahovah, not the Canaananite God Yahweh. Yah is a Holy Name, as is El, as in Eloah as the Holy Name. Sorry, before that was Shin-Memf and directly preceding YHVH, appears to be "Blessed be" .. or ... the Name, which fits much better. Does Hebrew jumble words out of sequence? I guess regardless if I hit alternate sentences with ShM being one of the two, then we have a couple answers. Or I could just use Google Translate.

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[DiLoco_DelEted]

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Saturday 4-8-2023 (4+8+7=19=1). Saturn. Black-indigo.

Sleep - Slept most of day.
Dreams - Some, none recalled.
Anxiety - High

Current Transits -
Moon Phase -
Weather -

Mental Notes -
Mood -
Physical Notes -

Rituals - PM Zelator Formula partially done. Didn't even complete Neophyte Formula. Will do each to the letter/"T" today (Sunday)

Tarot -
Card of the Day: 0 The Fool. Aleph, ox, 1. 11th Path of Sepher Yetzirah. Kether to Chokmah. Holy Spirit.
Split Hexagram Spread
Greater Spiritual Influence - 0 The Fool
Lesser Spiritual Influence - V Hierophant
Spiritual Advice - Prince of Disks
Final Outcome - XX Aeon
Conscious Desires - VI The Lovers
Unconscious Desires - Queen of Cups
Practical Advice - Knight of Wands

Funny that I was thinking energy of that of tilling the earth of an erupting volcano..the Prince (King) of Disks, Fire of Earth is tilling the earth aided by a bull (Taurus), while Sir of Fire, the Knight of Wands appears to be an erupting volcano energy.
We have for the advice pair the Knight of Wands (Practical) and the Prince of Disks (Spiritual).
For the desires pair, we have the Lovers and Queen of Cups. No comment.
For the Influence pair, we have The Fool and the Hierophant.
For the final Outcome we have the Aeon.

Now the question is, what does this all mean as a solution to a problem?

It is alchemy any way.

Mental Note:
I always have hacker assholes that make me have to reboot my PC, closing down all open documents. Think I will install a VPN.

Magical Mental Note:
So, in pursuit of life, if in a low state, low Magick is a base stabilizer and Magick a base, high Magick an upper. Do low Magick pursuit with alchemy it is.


Ritual - PM Zelator Formula (done partially, not even Neophyte Formula in full)
Faced East.
Did Lord of the Universe Adoration. Liber Resh Vel Helios adorations to Keppra (Midnight).
Performed Qaballistic Cross Ritual.
Performed LRP, Earth Banishing.
Performed Sacred Chamber Ritual.
Performed LRH Saturn Banishing.
Vibrated Divine Names, Choirs, Archangels of Malkuth.
Vibrated Malkuth drawing Earth glyph in each quarter and vibrating the Divine Names.
Mental Note:
Mind on the material and materialism lessened to great degree, feel grounded. The Prince of Earth (Air of Earth) seems to be a good Practical advice, the Knight of Wands energy patterns with the Spiritual Advice and pathwork Shin and Tav.


Fire of Fire and Air of Earth...As an energy pattern. Fire Meridian Chi Gong perhaps? Fire invoking? Midnight is reportedly Sol, but Mercury hour locally. Very interesting. Wonder what lunar house it is zodiacally speaking. Fiery toward thinking of how to get this radio station up on the internet successfully with a successful backup minus certain files. Being positive and masculine and energetic. Fiery responses with an earth peace about it. Fire Air and Earth. Banish Water basically. Banish Water and Saturn, invoke Fire. Pathwork Shin and Tav perhaps.

Physical Note:
Had more technical problems due to God knows what now, wardrivers or insufficient memory.
Shutoff wifi and worked on prealgebra program, next is precalculus program, modeled after this. I also cbimed the binary calculator functions into the prealgebra program, as well as the power source code and test driver code.
Looking at Numerical Methods in Python, with Systems of Linear Equations. Hopefully can integrate that into the precalculus or an algebra program. Likely that is the progression:
PreAlgebra, Geometry ,Algebra, and finally PreCalculus. All C code by gcc.

Ritual Note:
Used beads, and got too lightheaded and absent-minded from the first week beads chain and decade (single between week bead sets and is Sign of the Cross) bead Divine Names.
Saw the tree of life series as a Vav. Hard to explain, but saw something there. Perhaps duplicating it will flesh out more detail. Thought I saw a naked man.
Three week bead sets done before abruptly ending with Sign of the Cross.


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Sunday 4-9-2023, 02:24. Sol. Yellow/Gold.

Sleep - About to sleep after moving categorization complete. I.e. Load1 Load2 Load3 etc.
Dreams - None yet.
Anxiety - High
Current Transits -
See above Transits. Not much change.
Moon Phase - Waning Gibbous in Scorpio Pink Moon.
Weather - Partly Cloudy, 60s.
Mood -Fair
Mental Notes - See below
Physical Notes - See Below

Rituals - PM Zelator Formula partially done. Didn't even complete Neophyte Formula. Will do each to the letter/"T" today (Sunday)

Tarot -
Card of the Day: Queen of Disks, Binah of Assiah, Water of Earth, N1 of NANTA.
Daily Split Hexagram Spread (Thoth)
Greater Spiritual Influence - Queen of Disks. Water of Earth. N1 of NANTA. Binah of Assiah.
Lesser Spiritual Influence - I The Magus. Mercury. Kether to Binah.
Spiritual Advice - Princess of Wands. Earth of Fire. M of BITOM. Malkuth of Atziluth.
Final Outcome -II The Priestess. Luna. Gimel, camel, 4. Kether to Tiphareth.
Conscious Desires -Prince of Cups. Air of Water. M of HCOMA. Tiphareth of Briah.
Unconscious Desires - Knight of Disks. Air of Earth, T of NANTA. Tiphareth of Assiah.
Practical Advice - Queen of Wands. Water of Fire. T of BITOM. Binah of Atziluth.

Top of Deck - XVII The Star, Heh, window, 5. Hope, meditation, aspiration, harmony, balance. Aquarius.


Physical/Mental Notes:
I guess I start a pot of coffee and get to work with separating stuff to move.
Was going to clean up the post, but guess not.
So...start pot of coffee. Code code code.
Slow consumption of nicotine pouches.
Work on server scripts, make sure airtight and rock solid bastille setup.
Work on disaster recovery plan until airight and rock solid with successful test restore and lockout drill.
Work on solid earth grounding in Zelator Formula.
Pathwork Shin and Tav, as well as today's Sunday CotD and DSHS paths revealed as SA PA and FO paths or elements.
Currently reading step by step mathematics operation instructions to code into the program prealgebra.c file.
Work next on server hardening script, hardenOS.py until working and duplicated or attempted on Linux Ubuntu 14 laptop setup.
Work next on moving categorization.

Mental Note:
I figure on moving, bumping this up as priority 1 to categorize moving - for Furniture I have five (altar cabinet, cat tree, bin of clothes, cat carrier, shelving unit). For appliances I have six (PC, Monitor, Coffee maker, Lamp, Arctic Air, Fan). I have a lot of "other" I guess other comes first as long as all furniture are empty. Then furniture and appliances and finally cat.
Importance High to low
1. Cat, Carrier, Supplies(Food, Toys, Litter/Box, Dishes, Cat Tree)
Papers, Sentimental Items, Art, Notebooks, Books, Art Supplies
2. Appliances/Dishes (Dishes, Lamp, Laptops, Computer/Monitor, Mr Coffee)
3. Clothing/Furniture (Shelving Unit, Liquor Cabinet, Chair)
4. Other/Food/Bath


Gambit. T, M, "G". TMG. GMT. Gamet. Gambit. Thats the advice and result. Actually, result is in reading and doing all including the final outcome.
This appears to be about planning and manifestation.


Ponder idea of knowledge domain interesections (yesterdays todays tomorrow) sequence, and common application (practical application)
Astronomy, Mathematics and (Organic) Chemistry with Biology applications, and in preparation to Chemistry, Math and Botany.
Follow ides on Mars DNA from asteroid collision in ancient times.

Organic Chem, Botany, Mineralogy - life from minerals and plants.

Mineralogy, Programming, Statistics; mineralogy statistics.


Ponder Atlantis still under Europe/Baltic Sea and settlements in Ireland via Book of Invasions.


Liquor cabinet and selling unit nearly emptied, books and notebooks piled up.
So ..
1. Cat, Carrier, Supplies(Food, Toys, Litter/Box, Dishes, Cat Tree)
Papers, Sentimental Items, Art, Notebooks, Books, Art Supplies
2. Appliances/Dishes (Dishes, Lamp, Laptops, Computer/Monitor, Mr Coffee)
3. Clothing/Furniture (Shelving Unit, Liquor Cabinet, Chair)
4. Other/Food/Bath

Cat will be moved first or last. Have not determined yet. Most likely first.
Most sentimental items gathered.
Get art and art supplies together.
Get books together in piles manageable loads.
Notebooks are gathered.
Box of geology samples last I guess among other.
Magic supplies as other as well.


Admittedly lacking in comprehension of some material and retention of most. This may change when coding and testing quiz engines.
My daily task along with main ritual load and mundane factors - moving has begun minus boxes.

Journal - Journal of my application of 200% effort into the "powers" of angels and demons myself.

Again, this journal is about applying yourself to be unaided by spirits. At the same time if their powers fit the situation to give praise, then praise them and continue. Yeah, I think a simple Botany quiz engine program. Another possibility is tracking plant growth with a harvest forecast. One...

wizardforums.com

Get A job tomorrow. On washtenaw .. preferably a sedate environment, carpeted a plus.
Ventured into Speedway, to get three On boxes, and this one guy was loud and rude, an emotional vampire, I warded myself and stood my ground, then went to CVS and found a few items .. a box of cereal and a pound of coffee. All for fifteen bucks.
Need to go shopping today. Medications up to date minus tomorrow morning, cannot find used dispensers.
Need to hit food pantry this day or tomorrow (Monday). Need to move this stuff tomorrow.


Listening to Rime of the Ancient Mariner, next song up is Wreck of th Edmubnd Fitzgerald.
So there is that. Then Titanic leaps to mind, then the questions...
Did the captains not bless all creatures before sailing?
Is there a common line besides sunken ship disasters?
How many sunken disasters are not recorded?
Do the sea gods have anything to do with everything?
What about Atlantis or the List of Sea Peoples?
And oin and on and on and on...

I have struggled with this issue early on, maybe a simple change of perspective can help you.

Instead of forcibly "quieting" your mind, you should act as an observer who observes your impulsive thoughts as they come and acknowledge them, WITHOUT engaging in them or else it will turn into daydreaming.

Eventually your mind and ego will quiet and stop barking about its impulsive wants and needs and like a glass of water full of sand, the sand will eventually fall to the bottom and stillen, allowing you to see clearly through the water.

It takes time but do not expect too much of yourself.

Keeping this in mind on meditating. Ive always tried silent mind, color of the day associations, mindfulness in the moment, five things mindfulness, intention, mantras, tarot cards, sigils, trying to visualize them strongly.
Now its like square zero abs(0) again


Writing in the sand, journaling, palm trees, vast dry fields, prime for an oil harvest.
A woman traveling with goods snd in luxury with the speed of spiders legs.
Perhaps a written contract on land. Perhaps a person moving goods.
These came to mind, concentrating on micros coping the card.

The fact that you are cautiously humble about it makes you an Adept.

The fact that you even know about the Opening by Watchtower makes you an Adept.
The fact that you say:

Makes you as powerful as Crowley. If you don't believe me read Magick Without Tears. If you find yourself anticipating everything he is saying, you might be a higher grade. Just don't make a big thing out of it.

Keeping in mind as well.


Burned quite a bit of the midnight oil. Have not done any rituals as of yet since last update.
On rosary for bead sets did "ADONAI HA ARETZ, ADONAI MELEKH, and on single beads MALKUTH. Grounding.
Getting piles ready to move in order of priority.

Post automatically merged: Apr 9, 2023

Listening to Goth Rock and studying math resources for aims of material subjects, prerequisites, and step by step methodology to arrive at the correct solution. Have started a prealgbra.c program to provide a menu based equation solver. Pre-Algebra only. Geom_Alg.c will be a Pre-Calculus level program, then calculus.c handles calculus and higher, including experimental math subjects. This could be thought of as a menu driven calculator really.
How this will be used as "Powers of Angels and Demons" ... intersect ideas and commonality on astronomy and organic chemistry from a meths standpoint.
In reference to #3 -- Geomancy and Astrology are my two new subjects, while not abandoning Tarot either. Black-White mirror exercise on cons of signs, planets, houses, planets in signs in houses and a transformation process to turn them into pros, for good or evil. Know thyself.
Know the past, present and future by Geomancy and Natal Astrology. Hail #1, #3.

Post automatically merged: Apr 9, 2023

Studying Hemi Gateway and Eight Extraordinary Meridians, as well as math and programming a menu driven calculator. Tomorrow is Organic Chem and Alchemy, while Tuesday is Botany and Plant Alchemy or Spagyrics.
Bad news and good news on housing and storage fronts. Chemistry of Botany processes showing the math would be a fair task to shoot for tomorrow in free time.

Post automatically merged: Apr 9, 2023

So, wrapping up today with moving prioritization and storage tomorrow.
Couch crash and or bed crash if I'm lucky. Or stay at my place until stuff is stored. Need to put kitty up for adoption.
Magickally speaking for tonight, Zelator Formula and Road Opener.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Was reading Eight Extraordinary Meridians and the Hemi-Sync Gateway Process, and seeing similarities, at least represented in figures.
Now reading Pre Algebra, Organic Chemistry and Outlines of Geology and Mineralogy, trying to draw an inference association or commonality.

Time, Energy, Heat, Pressure, these are common factors. Or let's say a Mars asteroid fell to earth carrying Mars DNA. Then what commonality do we find? Is it within TEHP?


About to do nightly rituals.


Done with Maths for the day. Done with coding for the day. Will concentrate on reading of OC and Botany.

Tomorrows appointments:
Morning - Meet with Case Worker and Med Reviews
Afternoon - Meet PCP for physical and hit food pantry.
Evening - Moving stuff over to friends place.
Within a couple weeks want to have money for move and a job paying weekly.
Within a couple months moving again.
Hopefully after a year of FTE can afford my own place west of here with car of my own.


Dif full cycle of Liber Resh Vel Helios adorations with grade signs, beginning in East after East Lord of the Universe Adoration.
Performed Qabballistic Cross Ritual, LBRP and Sacred Chamber Ritual.
Performed Middle Pillar Ritual.
Yes, did not perform Zelator Formula due to exhaustion, but Neophyte Formula was done. Will do Zelator Formula tomorrow.
Adoration to the Lord of the Universe in West.


Average source file is anywhere from 400 to 7000 in file size.
Have created source directory and header directory for future development.

Seeing a relational/spatial pattern in the Qi Gong document and the Hemi Sync Gateway.

About to call it a night as I have to be downtown I'm the morning.


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Monday 4-10-2023, 03:48. Sol. Silver/Gray.

Sleep - Slept close to six hours before waking at 3am. Put on coffee and jumped online.

Dreams - None recalled. No recall of evidence of dreaming to begin with.

Anxiety - High

Current Transits -

Sun

20°10’ Ari
Moon 10°30’ Sag

Disseminating (230°20’)
Mercury 9°22’ Tau
Venus 28°58’ Tau
Mars 7°56’ Can

Jupiter

21°21’ Ari
Saturn 3°39’ Pis
Uranus 17°16’ Tau
Neptune 26°03’ Pis
Pluto 0°15’ Aqu
Node (M) 4°56’ Tau R
Node (T) 4°02’ Tau
Lilith (M) 10°16’ Leo

Chiron

16°07’ Ari

Moon Phase - 81.8% Disseminating (Waning Gibbous) in Sag.

Weather - Partly Cloudy today
66 °F
Precipitation: 0%
Humidity: 36%
Wind: 9 mph

Mood -Fair

Mental Notes - See below

Physical Notes - See Below

Rituals -
AM Neophyte Formula
PM Zelator Formula.

Tarot -
Card of the Day: Ace of Disks. Spirit of Earth. N1 of NANTA. Root of the Powers of Earth. Kether of Malkuth in Assiah. N of EHNB.

Daily Split Hexagram Spread (Thoth)
Greater Spiritual Influence - Ace of Disks (see above)
Lesser Spiritual Influence - Queen of Wands. T of BITOM. Water of Fire. Binah of Atziluth.
Spiritual Advice - Princess of Wands. M of BITOM. Malkuth of Atziluth. Earth of Fire.
Final Outcome -Queen of Disks. N2 of NANTA. Water of Earth. Binah of Assiah.
Conscious Desires - XV The Devil. Ain, eye/fountain, 70. Hod to Tiphareth. 26th Path of the Sepher Yetzirah.
Unconscious Desires - III The Empress. Venus. Daleth, Door, 4. Binah to Chokmah. 24th Path of the Sepher Yetzirah.
Practical Advice - I The Magus. Mercury. Beth, house, 2. Kether to Binah. 12th Path of the Sepher Yetzirah.
Top of Deck - XVI Tower. Mars. Hod to Netxzach. 27th Path of Sepher Yetzirah. Peh, mouth, 80.
Bottom of Deck - Prince (King) of Swords. Fire of Air. X of EXARP. Prince of the Chariot of the Winds. Chokmah of Yetzirah.

Reading for Day: Alchemy, Organic/Chemistry, C Programming Language/Standard C Library, (Yesterday - Maths, Tomorrow - Botany)

Meditations:
Chakra Fruits (envision each chakra as a fruit in color spinning clockwise. R O Y G B I W
Mindfulness (Being in the moment, Five-Four-Three-Two-One)
Neophyte, Zelator meditations - Point, Line-Cube.

Pathworkings:
Malkuth, Auriel, Sandalphon.


What is interesting about the spread, is that in the first tried, the water triangle, the cards are Enochian related - NTM. One e earth, two fire.
What is also interesting is that the lower triad, the fire triangle, is all Majors, Capricorn, Venus, Mercury.
Final outcome is likewise an enochian card. (Disks).
Top of Deck is a Major (Mars), Bottom of Deck is another court card (Swords).


Had to re open all documents (tee hee? Whatever, you non talented non creative child minded village morons ("hackers")).
Do us all a favor and hack worthy targets instead. I am not America. I loosely call myself an. American, due to being Celtic. So gfy.
What possesses people to hack easy targets. Whats the point? If you dont try, you dont succeed. Now go fo and hack a worthy target instead of me.


Today is Chemistry/Alchemy day. That and bone up on Geomancy.
Loose goal: Black-White mirror exercise from Bardon, on transforming negative natal property to positive properties. Bone up on natal astrology.
Loose goal: Use "Get A Job" ritual to increase job availability.
Making and keeping and getting the most out of appointments today and everyday.
See case worker and express the fact that I am not only in housing transition, I am technically homeless. Get on Section 8 voucher.
See doctor and psych for medication reviews.
See doctor for physical and referrals.
Hit food pantry.
Move at least two cart loads to girlfriends place.
Get a job.

Post automatically merged: Apr 10, 2023

Not amused. At my computer network or indeed. How much horseshit must a person wade through.